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Oral/Correction

Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Oral/Correction
Message de alixm posté le 10-02-2016 à 12:15:51 (S | E | F)
Bonjour !
Je vais passer l'épreuve d'expression orale du Bac. J'ai donc écrit mon texte pour le chapitre "Myths and Heroes" et je voudrais avoir vos avis sur mon contenu ou encore ma grammaire.
Je vous remercie d'avance !


A myth is a fictionnal story, which appeared during greek antiquity. To me, a myth is not real, and just a made-up story that might be changed over time. And a hero can be a super hero or a real personn. I think being a superhero is not always easy, there are a lot of responsibilities. If you are a hero or if you're just famous, you must be an exemple and just after that you can be a hero or not.Because, you can't be a hero if you steal for example. Or just if you give what you stole to the poor, like robin and the hood. The heros must show example.
So we can wonder how heroes have changed.

So I will tell you about the heroes. And no any heroes, those of my childhood.
So I'll talk to you about a subject that fascinates me: Walt Disney. Indeed, among all the films released by Disney since its creation in 1923, the differences are many. That what, today, we will talk about "how heroes have changed" with version of Disney princesses cause this is with them as I grew up. So get ready because we start right away with a classic heroine called Cinderella!

The author is Charles Perrault. The tale was published in his book called «Conte du temps passé». The film was released in 1950. Cinderella is the image of women at this time. Indeed, she was under the authority of her stepmother. And although she is reduced to a fate of servant, she continues to dream of happiness. She then met Prince with his white horse, they got married and they lived happily and had many children. Moreover, in the classic princess cartoons the end is always the same way. A handsome prince comes looking for them and they lived happily until the end of time, it’s a little unreal right?

However, Disney has evolved! Indeed, Princesses of today are very different. Attitudes have changed a lot and cartoons too. For example, in «The Princess and the Frog ", released in 2009, the character Tiana is a black princess! She works hard in a restaurant, do not almost sleep and spends a lot of time in transport! And this is why we can say that Tiana and one modern heroin. And in 1950, a young black girl could never become a princess!! Parce qu'à l'époque, où le film se déroule. il était impossible de voir une personne de race noire au pouvoir. A cette époque, beaucoup de gens ont passé leur vie dans la lutte contre le racisme et bien sûr une femme Rosa Parks américain.

Disney also released a cartoon called Mulan. Mulan is the name of the young heroine of this film. Unlike other Disney cartoons, Mulan is not a princess. She is courageous and bold. And she will not hesitate to turn into man to take the place of her father in the army!
She is the opposite of conventional image of Disney heroines.

So, for me, they are heroes. Disney has evolved with time. And today I think it's a very good thing that girls do not have just one idea of princesses. So that they can realize that even princesses life is not always rosy.
I have not talked much about Prince since it is not to them that girls identify. But subconsciously they dream of a perfect man does not exist. And in Frozen, Disney has managed to get another message not as usual. Like what the prince is not that important in the life of a princess. At least the girls are not disappointed when faced with reality.

-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 10-02-2016 12:46


Réponse: Oral/Correction de gerondif, postée le 10-02-2016 à 14:29:22 (S | E)
Bonjour.
erreurs en bleu, corrections en vert (ft = français traduit, ne se dit pas en anglais)

A myth is a fictionnal story, which appeared during the greek antiquity. To me, a myth is not real, and just a made-up story that might be changed over time. And a hero can be a super hero or a real personn. I think being a superhero is not always easy, there are a lot of responsibilities. If you are a hero or if you're just famous, you must be an exemple and just after that you can be a hero or not.Because, you can't be a hero if you steal for example. Or just if you give what you stole to the poor, like robin and the hood. The heros must show example(ft).
So we can wonder how heroes have changed.

So I will tell you about the heroes. And no any heroes, those of my childhood.
So I'll talk to you about a subject that fascinates me: Walt Disney. Indeed, among all the films released by Disney since its creation in 1923, the differences are many. That what(à tel point que ? construction incorrecte), today, we will talk about "how heroes have changed" with version of Disney princesses cause this is with them as(construction incorrecte ft) I grew up. So get ready because we start right away with a classical heroine called Cinderella!

The author is Charles Perrault. The tale was published in his book called «Conte du temps passé». The film was released in 1950. Cinderella is the image of women at this time. Indeed, she was under the authority of her stepmother. And although she is reduced to a fate of servant, she continues to dream of happiness. She then met Prince with his white horse, they got married and they lived happily and had many children. Moreover, in the classic princess cartoons the end is always the same way. A handsome prince comes looking for them and they lived happily until the end of time,(vous commencez au présent pour finir au prétérit, ça ne va pas) it’s a little unreal right (familier, ce right ) ?

However, Disney has evolved! Indeed, the Princesses of today are very different. Attitudes have changed a lot and cartoons too. For example, in «The Princess and the Frog ", released in 2009, the character Tiana is a black princess! She works hard in a restaurant, do not almost sleep (hardly ever sleeps) and spends a lot of time in transport! And this is why we can say that Tiana and'EST, pas et !!) one(on n'est pas en train de les compter, one ne va pas) modern heroin. And in 1950, a young black girl could never become a princess!! Parce qu'à l'époque, où le film se déroule. il était impossible de voir une personne de race noire au pouvoir. A cette époque, beaucoup de gens ont passé leur vie dans la lutte contre le racisme et bien sûr une femme Rosa Parks américain.

Disney also released a cartoon called Mulan. Mulan is the name of the young heroine of this film. Unlike other Disney cartoons, Mulan is not a princess. She is courageous and bold. And she will not hesitate to turn into a man to take the place of her father in the army!
She is the opposite of the conventional image of Disney heroines.

So, for me, they are heroes. Disney has evolved with time. And today I think it's a very good thing that girls do not have just one idea of princesses. So that they can realize that even a princess's life is not always rosy(ft).
I have not talked much about Princes since it is not to them that girls identify. But subconsciously they dream of a perfect man who does not exist. And in Frozen, Disney has managed to get another message not as usual(inhabituel?). Like what(ft. comme quoi ?) the prince is not that important in the life of a princess. At least the girls are not disappointed when faced with reality.



Réponse: Oral/Correction de alixm, postée le 10-02-2016 à 15:52:17 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup pour cette réponse, je vais changer mes fautes au plus vite et je vous remercie de m'avoir aidée ! notamment pour les expression françaises que je n'arrivais pas à donner en anglais. Je pense supprimer celles qui ne se traduisent pas comme "always rosy"




Réponse: Oral/Correction de gerondif, postée le 10-02-2016 à 16:59:38 (S | E)
cf "Queen" it's not a bed of roses"




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