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Julia Roberts (correction)
Message de stefanie1 posté le 02-12-2006 à 18:11:32 (S | E | F | I)
Bonsoir,
Pour l'école j'ai dû choisir un personnage qu'on apprécie,et en faire une biographie.
J'ai pris Julia Roberts.
J'ai fais mon texte mais je ne sais pas si c'est juste.
Pouvez vous m'aider a corrigé mon texte.
Merci.
Voici le texte:
Julia Roberts was born in the United States on 28 October, 1967. She has a big brother and an older sister.Her mother works in the real estate. And his father is a teacher of art drammatic. But his father dies when it is 9 years old. Later it wishes to become journalist. She begins her studies in journalism but stopped to become actress. She starts to make publicities and she obtains a role in the film “Fierhouse”. In film “Satisfaction and Mystic Pizza” which it starts to see of success. After the realizer to Julia Roberts a great role in the film “Pretty Woman offers " where it is a prostitute who is in love with a rich person billionaire, who is Richard Gere.She is elected best the actress of the year. After its success it is unhappy because of its marriage. It takes again its career hand. Then it plays in several films as “the marriage of my best” “Thunderbolt in NOthing Hill” friend who is a film drole and which had large successes. It is the woman best paid of “Hollywood”. And it universally known.
Julia Roberts creates his house of production where it makes its films.
She meets Danny Moder who is the cameraman. She gets married on 4 July 2002. She is waits for 2 twins who are born on 20 November 2004.
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Modifié par bridg le 02-12-2006 18:12
Titre
Message de stefanie1 posté le 02-12-2006 à 18:11:32 (S | E | F | I)
Bonsoir,
Pour l'école j'ai dû choisir un personnage qu'on apprécie,et en faire une biographie.
J'ai pris Julia Roberts.
J'ai fais mon texte mais je ne sais pas si c'est juste.
Pouvez vous m'aider a corrigé mon texte.
Merci.
Voici le texte:
Julia Roberts was born in the United States on 28 October, 1967. She has a big brother and an older sister.Her mother works in the real estate. And his father is a teacher of art drammatic. But his father dies when it is 9 years old. Later it wishes to become journalist. She begins her studies in journalism but stopped to become actress. She starts to make publicities and she obtains a role in the film “Fierhouse”. In film “Satisfaction and Mystic Pizza” which it starts to see of success. After the realizer to Julia Roberts a great role in the film “Pretty Woman offers " where it is a prostitute who is in love with a rich person billionaire, who is Richard Gere.She is elected best the actress of the year. After its success it is unhappy because of its marriage. It takes again its career hand. Then it plays in several films as “the marriage of my best” “Thunderbolt in NOthing Hill” friend who is a film drole and which had large successes. It is the woman best paid of “Hollywood”. And it universally known.
Julia Roberts creates his house of production where it makes its films.
She meets Danny Moder who is the cameraman. She gets married on 4 July 2002. She is waits for 2 twins who are born on 20 November 2004.
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Modifié par bridg le 02-12-2006 18:12
Titre
Réponse: Julia Roberts (correction) de lethidee, postée le 02-12-2006 à 18:50:33 (S | E)
Bonsoir,
Voici mon aide pour la correction de ce texte, elle est loin d'être parfaite mais je vous la soumets bien volontiers.
Julia Roberts was born in the United States on 28 October, 1967. She has a big brother oldest than she and an oldest sister. Her mother worked in the real estate and her father was a teacher of Drama Art. But her father died when she was 9 years old. Later she wishes to become journalist. She began her studies in journalism but stopped them to become an actress. She started to make publicities and she obtained a role in the film “Fierhouse”. It’s with the film “Satisfaction and Mystic Pizza” that she started to get success. After the realizer to Julia Roberts a great role in the film “Pretty Woman offers " where she played a character of a prostitute who felt in love with a very rich person e, who is played by Richard Gere she was electedt the best actress of the year. After this success it is unhappy because of its marriage. Now, she went on her career and she played in several films as “the marriage of my best friend”, “Thunderbolt in NOthing Hill” who is a funny movie and which got a great success. She is one of the best woman paid of “Hollywood”, and she is universally known.
Julia Roberts created her private society of production where she realises her own films.
She met Danny Moder who is a professional cameraman. She got married on 4 July 2002. She has 2 twins who were born on 20 November 2004.
lethidee
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Modifié par bridg le 02-12-2006 19:20
Il serait gentil, suivant l'éthique du site de ne pas donner de corrections toutes faites. Merci de votre compréhension.
Réponse: Julia Roberts (correction) de jean31, postée le 02-12-2006 à 18:52:27 (S | E)
Bonsoir stéfanie1,
Sans vouloir te décourager, ton texte est truffé de fautes.
Commence par éliminer celles que je te signale.
=> L'adjectif possessif s'accorde en genre avec le possesseur.Donc, pour dire "son" père, tu emploies le même adjectif que pour "sa" mère. Tu comprends ? C'est "son" père à "elle".
=> L'art dramatique = drama, tout court.
=> Tu fais un récit d'événements passés, donc emploie le prétérit. Toujours. N'y mélange pas de présent !
=> faire de la publicité = to advertise
=> commencer à avoir du succès = to start being successful
=> who est le pronom relatif à employer lorsque l'antécédent est une personne. Pas quand c'est une chose, un film.
=> Julia Roberts is a pretty woman, isn't she? Pourquoi diable la rabaisses-tu au rang de chose ? Quel est le pronom sujet à employer pour une femme ?
Allez, prends tout le temps nécessaire pour déjà rectifier tout ça, on y verra un peu plus clair.
Courage et à te lire.
Réponse: Julia Roberts (correction) de stefanie1, postée le 02-12-2006 à 19:08:13 (S | E)
Ok je vais essayer.
Merci
de votre aide.Réponse: Julia Roberts (correction) de stefanie1, postée le 02-12-2006 à 19:09:07 (S | E)
Désolée je me suis trompé
encore 1000000 de fois désolée.
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Modifié par bridg le 02-12-2006 19:18
Réponse: Julia Roberts (correction) de jean31, postée le 02-12-2006 à 19:31:33 (S | E)
Il n'y a aucune offense, stéfanie1.
Réponse: Julia Roberts (correction) de stefanie1, postée le 02-12-2006 à 20:07:22 (S | E)
Ok merci!
Réponse: Julia Roberts (correction) de pyan, postée le 02-12-2006 à 20:28:18 (S | E)
To "take something in hand" is an idomatic expression.
Good luck
Réponse: Julia Roberts (correction) de nick27, postée le 02-12-2006 à 20:31:25 (S | E)
Hello,
Une petite précision pour l'écriture des dates en anglais :
À l'oral, on dit :
... The 28th of October, 1967.
À l'écrit :
... October 28th, 1967.
Donc, dans ton texte, il serait bon de remplacer "on 28 October, 1967" par "on October 28th, 1967"
Bye
Réponse: Julia Roberts (correction) de stefanie1, postée le 02-12-2006 à 20:58:39 (S | E)
Merci Nick27 du conseil.
INDISPENSABLES : 