correction SVP

<< Retour au forum

CLIQUEZ ICI POUR REPONDRE A CE SUJET

Message de ivanild posté le 2004-12-06 14:05:42 (S | E | F | I)
I am writing this letter, in hopes that you forgive me. I knowthat I'm not perfect person. There are many things I repent. Particularly, the murder of your son. I never meant to do those things to you. I'm very sorry that I hurt you. it's something I must live with everyday. The ground which i killed your son is : There was three months, I was with my girlfriend to a party.There was your son and his friend. But in the evenig, I had a drink and when I returned, my girlfriend had disappeared. i looked for her during a long time but i didn't fand her.In the down, I fand her. She was in the garden, undressed and battered. She lay on the floor totally stuned. She told me that she was violated by your son and his friend.
I was in weath. She had not put up with this, she sucided two months laters.
I bought a gun and I took revenge. I killed them. Now I fell totally lost. And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed. I 'd give anything to clear this horrible death. All I fell is hate.Will you forgive me? for all those things I've done. Now you know THE GROUND!

Ps: Her name is Mandy.

Si quelqu'un me le corrige ce serai vraiment gentil. Car c'est remplis de fautes en tout genres.

Réponse: re:correction SVP de cocoon, postée le 2004-12-06 15:43:54 (S | E)
Bonjour! Voilà une petite correction déjà:

I am writing this letter, in the hopes that you will forgive me. I know that I'm not a perfect person. ~~There are many things~~ I repent of many things. Particularly, the murder of your son. I never meant to do those things to you. I'm very sorry that I hurt you. It's something I must live with everyday. The (ground which?) reason why I killed your son is : ~~There was~~ three months ago, I was with my girlfriend to at a party.There was your son and his friend. But in the evenig, I had a drink and when I returned? looked back, my girlfriend had disappeared. I looked for her ~~during~~ for a long time but I didn't find her.In the down?, I found her. She was in the garden, undressed and ~~battered~~ beat up. She lay down the floor totally stunned. She told me that she has been raped by your son and his friend.
I was in weath?. She didn't pull herself together, she committed sucide two months laters.
I bought a gun and I took revenge on your son and his friend. I killed them. Now I feel totally lost. And I'm completely mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed. I 'd give anything to clear? this horrible death. All I feel is hate.Will you forgive me? for all those things I've done. Now you know THE GROUND! ?

Il reste encore quelques mots que je n'ai pas compris (par rapport à leur sens et à leur emploi dans ce texte, ils sont en italique et suivis d'un ? .
C'est pour avoir leur traduction française.
A bientôt!

-------------------
Edité par cocoon le 2004-12-06 18:12:22

Réponse: re:correction SVP de ivanild, postée le 2004-12-06 17:44:49 (S | E)
c'est trés gentil d'avoir repondu!
Pour les mots que tu n'as pas compris j'ai trouvé un autre sens
Sinon tu le trouve comment ce texte?
le sujet étant : vous êtes Andy Williams et vous avez tué deux ados alors vour écrivez une lettre de regrets aux parents.

-------------------
Edité par marie37400 le 06-12-2004 20:19

Réponse: re:correction SVP de cocoon, postée le 2004-12-06 17:53:48 (S | E)
Je la trouve bien, puisque la raison du meurtre est expliquée, il y a aussi les excuses faites aux parents et l'explication de l'état dans lequel se trouve maintenant le tueur. Parfait!

Réponse: re:correction SVP de serena, postée le 2004-12-06 18:31:37 (S | E)
All I feel is ~~hate~~ hatred towards myself. ( Je suppose que tu parles de la haine comme sentiment. Mais tu ne précises pas envers qui. )

Ton texte est très crédible.

CLIQUEZ ICI POUR REPONDRE A CE SUJET