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Tout ce qui a un rapport avec l'apprentissage de l'anglais: grammaire, orthographe, aides aux devoirs, phrases etc.
back to England...
Message de zazafraise posté le 18-09-2005 à 15:48:18 (S | E | F | I)
HI! I just want to know what you think about this commentary (Th shape of snakes by Minette WALTERS), so please tell me if there're any mistakes or reformulations to do... thks a lot
Sam's job has had bas consequences on his lifestyle. Actually, he has run a busy life and it was very harmful to his health, as a result, he has had a heart-attack. Then, he had moved back, that's why he must have changed his lifestyle, to stay in good health.
Sam and his wife were high enough to afford not to work immediatly so they had an easy life abroad because they could put aside. In fact, they realised they were mistaken, because it was very different from what they hoped : nowadays, life is extremly expensive in U.K.
They also realised that British society was rather different from what it used to be : the way of life is quicker, traffic jam is present in many roads, and people have other pastimes which are quite expensive... The British society was becoming a modern society with its individualism and all its features.
Next, Sam lied to an old friend about his job and his wage. He needed to lie because it was possible that he felt inferior than Jock (his old friend), and to do not deceive him.
But, Sam and his wife don't share the same opinion, because this woman has always known that Jock exxagerated everything about his life, whereas Sam did not think in the same way... He made a sort of complex about this "inferiority" and he tought it was because of this reason, they've been left behind by all their friends.
At the end of the passage, we can guess that Sam feelsquite down-hearted because he imagines the possible Jock's visit... He wishes that they had'nt sol their former english house because of its very good advantages.
Thks thank you to pay it intentions!
je vous conseille ce livre il est très intéressant. Merci
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Edité par bridg le 20-09-2005 19:17
retrait de votre dernière question, vous n'êtes pas sur le bon forum
Message de zazafraise posté le 18-09-2005 à 15:48:18 (S | E | F | I)
HI! I just want to know what you think about this commentary (Th shape of snakes by Minette WALTERS), so please tell me if there're any mistakes or reformulations to do... thks a lot
Sam's job has had bas consequences on his lifestyle. Actually, he has run a busy life and it was very harmful to his health, as a result, he has had a heart-attack. Then, he had moved back, that's why he must have changed his lifestyle, to stay in good health.
Sam and his wife were high enough to afford not to work immediatly so they had an easy life abroad because they could put aside. In fact, they realised they were mistaken, because it was very different from what they hoped : nowadays, life is extremly expensive in U.K.
They also realised that British society was rather different from what it used to be : the way of life is quicker, traffic jam is present in many roads, and people have other pastimes which are quite expensive... The British society was becoming a modern society with its individualism and all its features.
Next, Sam lied to an old friend about his job and his wage. He needed to lie because it was possible that he felt inferior than Jock (his old friend), and to do not deceive him.
But, Sam and his wife don't share the same opinion, because this woman has always known that Jock exxagerated everything about his life, whereas Sam did not think in the same way... He made a sort of complex about this "inferiority" and he tought it was because of this reason, they've been left behind by all their friends.
At the end of the passage, we can guess that Sam feelsquite down-hearted because he imagines the possible Jock's visit... He wishes that they had'nt sol their former english house because of its very good advantages.
je vous conseille ce livre il est très intéressant. Merci
-------------------
Edité par bridg le 20-09-2005 19:17
retrait de votre dernière question, vous n'êtes pas sur le bon forum
Réponse: back to england... de magmatic_rock, postée le 18-09-2005 à 15:59:06 (S | E)
je rigole et ce n'est pas méchant mais juste car Audrey 75 a posé la même question il y a environ 2h!La question est : Would you be ready to go and live in faraway countries if it meant getting a better life?
Ne serait-ce pas un exercice donné par votre professeur? Allez un effort comme on a dit à Audrey et après on vous aidera mais si seulement l'une d'entre vous fait l'effort et que les deux reprennent la correction qui sera faite par les membres qui vous corrigerons alors vous allez avoir la même copie à rendre et atention quand le professeur va s'en rendre compte! Ne faites pas cette erreur!
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Edité par bridg le 20-09-2005 19:22
Réponse: back to england... de zazafraise, postée le 18-09-2005 à 16:03:11 (S | E)
non ce n'est pas un exercice donné par une professeur c'est seulement le corrigé du sujet de bac de l'année dernière... et je déisre simplement savoir votre opinion puisque j'ai une ami uruguayenne qui est en france depuis 4 ans maintenant et qui est arrivée en France sans parler un seul mot de francais (elle a tout de même mis un an et demi à le parler) et je voulais savoir si certaines personnes seraient
)mais ce n'est certainement pas pour faire une dissertation d'anglais comme l'autre jeune fille!!!!!!!!!! (sinon il y aurait longtemps que je serais allé sur les corriges de bac pour trouver les pistes du sujet.......)
au passage puisque tu te sens fort pour donner de telles remarques regarde un peu mon commentaire et dis moi s'il y a des fautes
! 
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Edité par bridg le 20-09-2005 19:26
En plus des fautes, merci de ne pas écrire en abrégé.
Réponse: back to england... de magmatic_rock, postée le 18-09-2005 à 16:09:31 (S | E)
Je ne me sent pas fort!
Moi je suis débutant en anglais mais comme j'ai vu la même question posée en 2h je pensais que c'était cela! Désolé si je me suis trompé!Ensuite pour corriger ton petit essai je n'ai malheureusement pas les capacités pour le faire mais oui j'ai vu des fautes!
Réponse: back to england... de zazafraise, postée le 18-09-2005 à 16:13:30 (S | E)
c'est bien dommage
et la prochaine fois ne te fie pas aux premieres impressions!
bizoOoux
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Edité par marie37400 le 19-09-2005 12:16
Réponse: back to england... de ourimba, postée le 20-09-2005 à 17:50:23 (S | E)
Sam’s job has had bad consequences on his lifestyle. Actually, he has led such a hectic life that it was harmful to his health, and he has had a heart attack. As a result of this, he has moved back and changed his lifestyle to try and preserve his health.
Sam and his wife thought they were financially comfortable enough that they didn’t have to work immediately, as their life abroad had allowed them to put aside some money. However, they soon realized they were mistaken as the cost of living in the UK nowadays is very expensive.
They also realized that British society was rather different from what it used to be: life moves more quickly, many roads have become jammed with traffic, and people have more expensive pastimes. British society was becoming a modern individualistic society with all it’s associated attributes.
Then Sam lied to Jock (an old friend) about his former job and salary level. He felt the need to lie so that he would not feel inferior to Jock about his actual situation.
Unfortunately, Sam and his wife did not share the same opinion. Sam’s wife always knew that Jock exaggerated everything about his life, whereas it wouldn’t occur to Sam to do this. Sam developed an inferiority complex and felt that this was the reason they had been left behind by their friends.
At the conclusion of the passage we come to believe that Sam feels quite down-hearted as he imagines Jock’s visit. He wishes he hadn’t sold their former house in England and given up all of the advantages it provided.
Réponse: back to England... de zazafraise, postée le 22-09-2005 à 20:20:04 (S | E)
thanks a lot ourimba! If u need anything in french I'm here!!!
lots of love xxx
Réponse: back to England... de englishgirl, postée le 24-09-2005 à 00:56:59 (S | E)
Hello, I'll try it too... I'm a native English speaker in English-Canada...
Sam's job has had bad consequences on his lifestyle.
(has had bad is not a good sequence of words in English)
Sam's job impacted his lifestyle in many ways. In fact, his life had been so busy that his health was suffering, and he suffered a heart-attack. Then, he moved back (to where?), because he needed to change his lifestyle to stay in good health.
Sam and his wife could afford not to work immediatly, so they had an easy life abroad because they could put money aside. (the previous sentence makes no sense, I don't know what you're trying to say) Later, though, they realised that they were wrong. Modern-day U.K. was very different from what they had hoped : life had become extremely expensive.
British society was different from what it had been : the way of life was now quicker, traffic jams were everywhere, and people had new, more expensive hobbies... British society was becoming a modern society with its individualism and its other features.
Next, Sam lied to his old friend Jock about his job and his wage. He needed to lie because he felt inferior to Jock, and he also did not want to disappoint him. (???? I didn't understand what you meant by deceive)
Sam and his wife didn't share the same opinion, because she had always known that Jock exxagerated everything about his life... He had developed a sort of complex about this "inferiority", and he thought that this was to blame for the fact that they had been left behind by all their friends. (I didn't understand that either - the inferiority was to blame for their friends dumping them???)
At the end of the passage, we can guess that Sam feels quite down-hearted because he imagines Jock's possible future visit... He wishes that they had'nt sold their former english house.
from Katy
Réponse: back to England... de englishgirl, postée le 24-09-2005 à 00:58:40 (S | E)
I know that you learn that "has had" is proper English, but you should avoid using those two words together and think of alternatives, because it's not good style to put those words together over and over again.
from Katy
Réponse: back to England... de traviskidd, postée le 24-09-2005 à 23:36:01 (S | E)
I disagree. "Has had" is perfect English, in reality as well as in theory. However, it is true that it should not be overused, as is the case with any phrase.
Sam's job has had bad consequences on his lifestyle is quite good. (I might prefer "has been detrimental to" to "has had bad consequences on", but that's just a personal preference.)
P.S. Ourimba is a native English-speaker ... if Australian counts as English.
Réponse: back to England... de ourimba, postée le 25-09-2005 à 00:57:04 (S | E)
I agree with Traviskidd that "has been detrimental" is a better way of expressing this concept. englishgirl raises a good point about the statement "Sam moved back" I assumed this piece is an excerpt and that where he moved back to was covered in a previous section. If not, then the sentence does indeed need to specify where he moved back to.
Australian is considered to be English
but I would say that it's closer to UK English than USA English. It took me a long time to get used to the dialect of English spoken in the USA. They say some pretty strange things here Réponse: back to England... de zazafraise, postée le 25-09-2005 à 18:15:42 (S | E)
THANKS FOR ALL
INDISPENSABLES : 