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correction pour lettre de motivation.
Message de hikakaru posté le 16-03-2006 à 18:32:41 (S | E | F | I)
Bonjour.
Dans le cadre de mes cours d'oral d'anglais il nous a été demandé de préparer une lettre de motivation pour simuler par la suite un entretien d'embauche. Le contexte : je me porte candidat à un poste de lecteur (=sorte de professeur assistant) en japonais à l'Université de Nantes.
Could anyone be so kind as to have a look at it and correct me when I'm wrong?
D'avance merci.
Jérémy (étudiant L3 Langues Etrangères Appliquées)
Voici le texte :
1st September 2006
Re : application for part-time Japanese teacher vacancy
Dear M.Tanaka,
I am writing to you to apply for the part-time Japanese teacher vacancy as advertised in the hall of the University, confident that my experience and motivation make me very suitable for this kind of job.
I have started learning Japanese in a self-taught manner at the age of 13 then after graduating from high-school I have decided to major in this language in the prestigious University of Jussieu in Paris. In 2004, I have obtained the level 1 of the JLPT (Japanese Language Proficiency Test), which is the highest one and has the reputation for being arduous even for native speakers. In 2005 I have passed my Master degree.
Besides my educational background, please find in the following points the reasons why I do feel convinced that my application is one of the best you may come across :
● From July 2005 to August 2006 I have participated to the famous JET program in which carefully selected French students have been brought to Japan in order to work as coordinator of international relations, and this has lead me to the creation of twin cities, work as a translator and promote the French language in Japan.
● As a French person, I think I will be able to put a new slant on the teaching of Japanese in Nantes because non-native speaker teachers often create a feeling of proximity which can be very helpful for the students.
● As I was born and raised in Nantes, I let you imagine the personal satisfaction that it would be for me to work in my hometown.
● In the long run, I would like to become a Japanese teacher in France therefore you can be sure I will be taking my job very seriously.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Jérémy P...
Enclosure
-------------------
Edité par bridg le 16-03-2006 18:33
Divers
-------------------
Edité par hikakaru le 16-03-2006 18:34
Message de hikakaru posté le 16-03-2006 à 18:32:41 (S | E | F | I)
Bonjour.
Dans le cadre de mes cours d'oral d'anglais il nous a été demandé de préparer une lettre de motivation pour simuler par la suite un entretien d'embauche. Le contexte : je me porte candidat à un poste de lecteur (=sorte de professeur assistant) en japonais à l'Université de Nantes.
Could anyone be so kind as to have a look at it and correct me when I'm wrong?
D'avance merci.
Jérémy (étudiant L3 Langues Etrangères Appliquées)
Voici le texte :
1st September 2006
Re : application for part-time Japanese teacher vacancy
Dear M.Tanaka,
I am writing to you to apply for the part-time Japanese teacher vacancy as advertised in the hall of the University, confident that my experience and motivation make me very suitable for this kind of job.
I have started learning Japanese in a self-taught manner at the age of 13 then after graduating from high-school I have decided to major in this language in the prestigious University of Jussieu in Paris. In 2004, I have obtained the level 1 of the JLPT (Japanese Language Proficiency Test), which is the highest one and has the reputation for being arduous even for native speakers. In 2005 I have passed my Master degree.
Besides my educational background, please find in the following points the reasons why I do feel convinced that my application is one of the best you may come across :
● From July 2005 to August 2006 I have participated to the famous JET program in which carefully selected French students have been brought to Japan in order to work as coordinator of international relations, and this has lead me to the creation of twin cities, work as a translator and promote the French language in Japan.
● As a French person, I think I will be able to put a new slant on the teaching of Japanese in Nantes because non-native speaker teachers often create a feeling of proximity which can be very helpful for the students.
● As I was born and raised in Nantes, I let you imagine the personal satisfaction that it would be for me to work in my hometown.
● In the long run, I would like to become a Japanese teacher in France therefore you can be sure I will be taking my job very seriously.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Jérémy P...
Enclosure
-------------------
Edité par bridg le 16-03-2006 18:33
Divers
-------------------
Edité par hikakaru le 16-03-2006 18:34
Réponse: correction pour lettre de motivation. de jean31, postée le 16-03-2006 à 21:58:47 (S | E)
Bonsoir Jérémy,
Mes propositions sont signalées en majuscules.
Dear Mr Tanaka,
I WOULD LIKE to apply for ...(il voit bien que tu lui écris !)
...//...
I STARTED (prétérit) learning Japanese in a self-taught manner at the age of 13. (nouvelle phrase) After graduating from high school, I DECIDED (preterit again) to major in THE JAPANESE language AT the University of Jussieu (laisse tomber l'adjectif, un peu m'as-tu-vu) in Paris. In 2004, I PASSED the JLPT level 1 (Japanese Language Proficiency Test) which is the highest one and has A reputation for being arduous even TO native speakers. In 2005, I PASSED (et de 3 !) my master's degree.
...//...
From July 2005 to August 2006, I TOOK PART IN the famous ...
... WERE brought to Japan in order to work as coordinator FOR international relations. (nouvelle phrase) This LED (V irrégulier) me to (0) TWINNING cities, workING as a translator and promotING the French language in Japan.
...//...
... which can be very helpful TO (0) students.
As I was born and raised in Nantes, YOU CAN imagine WHAT A personal satisfaction it would be to work in my home town.
In the long run, I would like to become a teacher of Japanese in France. Therefore you can be ASSURED I will DO my job very seriously.
YOURS sincerely,
* I hope this helps.
Réponse: correction pour lettre de motivation. de hikakaru, postée le 17-03-2006 à 16:21:49 (S | E)
Bonjour.
It does help! Cheers!
Jérémy
Réponse: correction pour lettre de motivation. de jean31, postée le 17-03-2006 à 17:16:08 (S | E)
Tu m'en vois ravi.
Bonne chance pour ton oral.
I'll keep my fingers crossed !
INDISPENSABLES : 