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Postuler en anglais...
Message de sonia0512 posté le 27-09-2006 à 16:31:19 (S | E | F | I)
Bonjour!
Je suis étudiante en dernière année de droit et je cherche un stage en Angleterre. Pour cela, j'ai rédigé une lettre de motivation en anglais, mais je ne suis pas sûre de moi et je voudrais envoyer quelque chose en anglais correct... Si vous maitrisez ce genre d'exercice, je vous serais très reconnaissante de m'aider. Tous vos conseils sont les bienvenus.
Je vous remercie par avance.
sonia
Object: demand of training of the end of studies within a legal service of company for period from April 1st till July 31st.
Madam, Sir,
Student master 2 " international jurist " at the university Toulouse 1, I am in search of a training in a legal service to enrich my corporate culture and confront me with the realities of the ground.
Your company, loaded with large-scale projects international and evolving in a very strong sector quite held attention, given that I plan to put a lot into a near future there. The programme which I finish, by the wealth of its educations and the importance which it grants(tunes) to the practice in company prepares qualified jurists adapted to the new needs of the companies which as your develop their activities in the international.
Effective and determined I acquired during my studies the capacity to work in a pluriculturel environment as well as to reflect and to exchange ideas in two different languages.
I would be filled to be able to live an experience(experiment) in a company(society) implanted in England and having missions abroad.
. It against part(party) I would implement(operate) everything to achieve the missions which you will confide(entrust) me.
I am held at your disposal and I hope that this short letter will convince you of the good to base of my step(method) and the quality of my motivation.
I began you to approve Madam, Sir, my respectful greetings.
-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 27-09-2006 16:39
Lettre de motivation: Divers / titre
Message de sonia0512 posté le 27-09-2006 à 16:31:19 (S | E | F | I)
Bonjour!
Je suis étudiante en dernière année de droit et je cherche un stage en Angleterre. Pour cela, j'ai rédigé une lettre de motivation en anglais, mais je ne suis pas sûre de moi et je voudrais envoyer quelque chose en anglais correct... Si vous maitrisez ce genre d'exercice, je vous serais très reconnaissante de m'aider. Tous vos conseils sont les bienvenus.
Je vous remercie par avance.
sonia
Object: demand of training of the end of studies within a legal service of company for period from April 1st till July 31st.
Madam, Sir,
Student master 2 " international jurist " at the university Toulouse 1, I am in search of a training in a legal service to enrich my corporate culture and confront me with the realities of the ground.
Your company, loaded with large-scale projects international and evolving in a very strong sector quite held attention, given that I plan to put a lot into a near future there. The programme which I finish, by the wealth of its educations and the importance which it grants(tunes) to the practice in company prepares qualified jurists adapted to the new needs of the companies which as your develop their activities in the international.
Effective and determined I acquired during my studies the capacity to work in a pluriculturel environment as well as to reflect and to exchange ideas in two different languages.
I would be filled to be able to live an experience(experiment) in a company(society) implanted in England and having missions abroad.
. It against part(party) I would implement(operate) everything to achieve the missions which you will confide(entrust) me.
I am held at your disposal and I hope that this short letter will convince you of the good to base of my step(method) and the quality of my motivation.
I began you to approve Madam, Sir, my respectful greetings.
-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 27-09-2006 16:39
Lettre de motivation: Divers / titre
Réponse: trouver un stage, postuler en anglais... de stantiti, postée le 27-09-2006 à 16:50:12 (S | E)
Bonjour, Sonia.
Je ne suis que formatrice d'anglais et je n'ai lu ta lettre que très rapidement, mais il me semble que tu devrais en premier essayer de faire des phrases moins longues. le but étant que tu ne perdes pas le fil de ce que tu voulais dire, et, pour ton ou tes futurs lecteurs, qu'ils puissent bien"capter" le message que tu auras voulu leur adresser.
Certains passages de ta lettre m'ont d'autre part fait penser à une traduction littérale de ta pensée, et ces bribes de phrases "sonnent" plus français qu'anglais. Essaye peut-être de trouver une périphrase de façon à ce que ton ou tes lecteurs comprennent ton idée sans penser que tu aies pu faire du "mot-à-mot".
Si tu veux des explications sur des passages précis de ton écrit, n'hésite pas. Bon courage pour la suite.
Bye bye, Véro
Réponse: Postuler en anglais... de etudiant, postée le 27-09-2006 à 18:22:58 (S | E)
Je vais essayer de le corriger. Je suis Américaine, donc il est possible que ma langue diffèrent un peu de celle d'un Britannique. J'en ai changé beaucoup pour que la lettre soit plus élégante.
Object: demand of training of the end of studies within a legal service of company for period from April 1st till July 31st.
*Object: To obtain post-graduate training with a legal services firm for the period from April 1 to July 31.
Madam, Sir,
*Dear Sir or Madam: (ou To whom it may concern
Student master 2 " international jurist " at the university Toulouse 1, I am in search of a training in a legal service to enrich my corporate culture and confront me with the realities of the ground.
*I am a "student master 2" (makes no sense in English, unless this is something you must be either British or a lawyer to understand) at the University of Toulouse and I am seeking further training in legal services so that I might experience corporate culture and get some real world experience.
Your company, loaded with large-scale projects international and evolving in a very strong sector quite held attention, given that I plan to put a lot into a near future there.
*Your company, due to its extensive large scale international projects and its presence in a very important market sector, caught my attention, as I intend to focus my efforts similarly in the near future.
The programme which I finish, by the wealth of its educations and the importance which it grants(tunes) to the practice in company prepares qualified jurists adapted to the new needs of the companies which as your develop their activities in the international.
*The program which I am about to complete, because of the strong education it imparts and the importance it places on corporate experience, prepares highly qualified jurists well suited to the needs of companies with a strong international focus such as your own.
*Effective and determined I acquired during my studies the capacity to work in a pluriculturel environment as well as to reflect and to exchange ideas in two different languages.
*During my studies, I acquired the ability to work in a multicultural environment and to reflect on and exchange ideas in two different languages.
I would be filled to be able to live an experience(experiment) in a company(society) implanted in England and having missions abroad.
*It would be my pleasure to be able to gain legal experience in an English company and work on (projects? not sure what you mean here by missions) abroad.
. It against part(party) I would implement(operate) everything to achieve the missions which you will confide(entrust) me.
*(I don't understand what you mean here by "It against part") If given the opportunity, I will do everything in my power to execute the tasks with which I will be entrusted to the highest standards of quality.
I am held at your disposal and I hope that this short letter will convince you of the good to base of my step(method) and the quality of my motivation.
* I am at your service and I hope that this short letter will convince you of the (don't understand "good to base of my step" ... guessing education?) quality of my education and my strong motivation to excel.
I began you to approve Madam, Sir, my respectful greetings.
* Sincerely, (Sincerely is the standard way to close a business letter)
INDISPENSABLES : 