Correction/ texte

Correction/ texte
Message de zlabn posté le 05-08-2022 à 20:26:28 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
Durant les vacances j'essaie de tenir la forme en anglais !, et du coup j’écris sur différents sujets, est-ce-que quelqu'un pourrait me corriger mon texte (description d'image), malheureusement je n'arrive pas à la retrouver (désolé!):

We can see a photograph. We are seeing a town flooded by a tsunami .Actually,it is flooding by a tsunami, We are also seeing skyscrapers. The picture suggests us a total disaster on the Earth, maybe it happened because a meteorite was heading toward the earth. From then on, we can imagine a lot of things, we can imagine the earth being razed to the ground 99%, because of a landslide for instance! It raises awareness and It behooves us to change things if we don’t want it to happen in real life

Merci mille fois pour vos réponses !

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Réponse : Correction/ texte de vaiana, postée le 06-08-2022 à 04:14:05 (S | E)
Hello I'm going to try to help you out

We can see a photograph in which we are seeing a town flooded by a tsunami .
I would have used the passive voice here: in which a town is being flooded by a tsunami

Actually,it is flooding by a tsunami (repetition of the previous sentence...what is the point?), We are also seeing skyscrapers (in it). The picture suggests us a total disaster on the Earth, which may have happened because a meteorite was heading (tense) toward(s) the earth and hit it. From then on, we can imagine a lot of things, we can imagine (repetition) the earth being razed/ knocked down to the ground 99%, for instance because of a landslide! It raises awareness and It (repetition) behooves us to change things if we don’t want this to happen in real life.

To be read about the verb "to suggest": Lien internet


Take care

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Réponse : Correction/ texte de zlabn, postée le 06-08-2022 à 08:15:05 (S | E)
Thank you so muchhhh, it's really nice!!!!!

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Réponse : Correction/ texte de gerondif, postée le 09-08-2022 à 12:45:26 (S | E)
Bonjour
Les verbes de perception ne se mettent pas en ing.
I can see you remplace le I am seeing you au sens de je te vois, je suis en train de te voir.
I can hear you : Je t'entends, inutile de crier.
I can smell something burning.
I can feel a stone in my shoe.
I can taste salt in my coffee ! Who did that ??

I am seeing somebody est, lui, un verbe d'action qui signifie fréquenter, rencontrer, consulter et il peut alors accepter ing.
Erreurs en bleu .
We can see a photograph (on se doute que vous n'êtes pas aveugle et que vous voyez une photo. Mieux vaudrait peut-être dire que vous êtes en train de la regarder, un verbe d'action : I am looking at a photo of a town...). We are seeing a town flooded by a tsunami .Actually,it is flooding by a tsunami (répétition inutile), We are also seeing skyscrapers. The picture suggests us (us n'est pas c.o.d.) a total disaster on the Earth, maybe it happened because a meteorite was heading toward the earth. From then on, we can imagine a lot of things, we can imagine the earth being razed to the ground 99% (99% est mal introduit et puis, la terre est déjà au sol comment la terre peut-elle être rasée jusqu'au sol, c'est bon pour des batiments qui s'élevaient au dessus du sol), because of a landslide for instance! It raises awareness and It behooves us to change things if we don’t want it to happen in real life.

On earth et on the (planet) Earth n'ont pas le même sens.

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Réponse : Correction/ texte de zlabn, postée le 12-08-2022 à 12:53:27 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup pour les précisions et la correction !

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