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Lettre de motivation (correction)
Message de syem posté le 01-04-2007 à 15:24:23 (S | E | F | I)
salut à tous
Je fait appel à vous car j'ai décidé de déposer ma candidature pour un poste de fille au pair pour cette été et je souhaiterai ,avoir des conseils ou des corrections de votre part.
voici ma lettre:
Hello every families! I look for a family of reception for duration of two months during July and August, 2007. I wish while improving my English to discover the other cultures, the traditions and the other persons. I hope a lot to learn especially humanely with in a family while bringing my help and my personality has your service
My name is XXX but my friends call me "Siem" I'm a French girl aged 21 years old who live in the city XXX(300000) in the south of France. I'm very happy, friendly and helpful person and social. I do my studies in the college of XXX; I study the trade. I have 2brothers
11 years old and 24 years old ), one sister (18 years old) and I also have 2 nieces (6 years and 4 years which I like very much) with whom I am necessarily occupied.. I enjoy going in museum and cinema. This what I like to know news know ledges. I like dancing and play sport. My hobby is meeting and knowing new people and learning languages. I want to become an Au pair because I like Children and I like travelling and discovering the world and his inhabitants and as au pair I can satisfy quite my wishes while returning service. So, If my profil is nice, choose me!. So can you help me in order to improve my English language?
I have quite a lot of experience(experiment) as to babysitter, has the birth of my small brother I was 9 years old and I be the biggest girl of the house and I had to help my mother in domestic tasks and take charge of my small brother (change her coat(layer), prepare its feeding-bottle, give to him to eat) and then later in the age of 14 years my cousin had to (acoucher) of her first daughter and a little time after her is fall encircled and could not assume her first daughter because of her health. And during 2 weeks of holidays I have of to help my aunt ( his mother) in housewife try but also for the girl and since I considers her as my niece, her and her sister.
And then in my 18 years I made of the babysitting occasionally, (notament) for both persons who me one fill(perform) child minders'(cares) references.
And since I am 20 years old I work as help (assistant) in home at the persons old and handicaped by my city (during the holidays school and two weekend a month).
If I clarified that I to wish rather to be accommodated at a Moslem family, it is not by dicrimination or judgment(sentence) of my part but simply because I am also Moslem and that I would not like to impose my worship(cult) to a family which can be cannot understand(include) my principles.( Deplus) that will facilitate the dialogue with my family of reception as well as practice of my worship(cult).
I am at present student in France and I shall soon wish to study in an anglosaxon country. It is the reason for which I shall wish to work as to the peer because it shall allow me to develop my knowledge in English but also to live a human experience which will be I hope for it unforgettable.
Thanks for reading my profile
Merci d'avance
-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 01-04-2007 15:26
Restez anonyme sur le Net, c'est préférable.
Divers
Message de syem posté le 01-04-2007 à 15:24:23 (S | E | F | I)
salut à tous
Je fait appel à vous car j'ai décidé de déposer ma candidature pour un poste de fille au pair pour cette été et je souhaiterai ,avoir des conseils ou des corrections de votre part.
voici ma lettre:
Hello every families! I look for a family of reception for duration of two months during July and August, 2007. I wish while improving my English to discover the other cultures, the traditions and the other persons. I hope a lot to learn especially humanely with in a family while bringing my help and my personality has your service
My name is XXX but my friends call me "Siem" I'm a French girl aged 21 years old who live in the city XXX(300000) in the south of France. I'm very happy, friendly and helpful person and social. I do my studies in the college of XXX; I study the trade. I have 2brothers
11 years old and 24 years old ), one sister (18 years old) and I also have 2 nieces (6 years and 4 years which I like very much) with whom I am necessarily occupied.. I enjoy going in museum and cinema. This what I like to know news know ledges. I like dancing and play sport. My hobby is meeting and knowing new people and learning languages. I want to become an Au pair because I like Children and I like travelling and discovering the world and his inhabitants and as au pair I can satisfy quite my wishes while returning service. So, If my profil is nice, choose me!. So can you help me in order to improve my English language? I have quite a lot of experience(experiment) as to babysitter, has the birth of my small brother I was 9 years old and I be the biggest girl of the house and I had to help my mother in domestic tasks and take charge of my small brother (change her coat(layer), prepare its feeding-bottle, give to him to eat) and then later in the age of 14 years my cousin had to (acoucher) of her first daughter and a little time after her is fall encircled and could not assume her first daughter because of her health. And during 2 weeks of holidays I have of to help my aunt ( his mother) in housewife try but also for the girl and since I considers her as my niece, her and her sister.
And then in my 18 years I made of the babysitting occasionally, (notament) for both persons who me one fill(perform) child minders'(cares) references.
And since I am 20 years old I work as help (assistant) in home at the persons old and handicaped by my city (during the holidays school and two weekend a month).
If I clarified that I to wish rather to be accommodated at a Moslem family, it is not by dicrimination or judgment(sentence) of my part but simply because I am also Moslem and that I would not like to impose my worship(cult) to a family which can be cannot understand(include) my principles.( Deplus) that will facilitate the dialogue with my family of reception as well as practice of my worship(cult).
I am at present student in France and I shall soon wish to study in an anglosaxon country. It is the reason for which I shall wish to work as to the peer because it shall allow me to develop my knowledge in English but also to live a human experience which will be I hope for it unforgettable.
Thanks for reading my profile
Merci d'avance
-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 01-04-2007 15:26
Restez anonyme sur le Net, c'est préférable.
Divers
INDISPENSABLES : 