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Bébés / (correction) (1)

<< Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas

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Bébés / (correction)
Message de flavie31 posté le 06-12-2008 à 10:54:10 (S | E | F)

Bonjour, j'ai fait un texte d'actualité que je dois lire en anglais.
Est ce qu'il n'y aurait pas quelques fautes ?
Merci à tous ceux qui prendrons le temps de le lire.



I'm going to talk about an incredible and pathetic story in Serrano's family.
The first last December, xxx, a woman of thirty-two years, lodged a complain against the owners of a clinic in xxx. She noticed, four years ago, that her daughter wasn't her biological child .
The fourth of July 1994, Sophie gives birth to a little girl who has a jaundice. The mother and baby are separated during a week for treating the baby in a special room. When the mother and her baby returned in their house, Sophie smelt a rat because her daughter had more hair than she was born.
However, doctors and paediatricians maintened it was absolutely normal.
The years passed and the skin of the little girl became more mate. Sophie explained this phenomenon by her Spanish origins but the father had doubts about his paternity and request a DNA test. They learned that they are neither of them parents of the girl.
Babies were exchanged fourteen years ago.
After a police investigation, she found her real daughter but they are very different.
Sophie recognized her adopted daughter, legally, but she suffers from this situation and she feels guilty of not having insisted with the doctors
I have chosen this subject because it is an incredibly and sad story. I am shocked that the affair is closed and that the private hospital doesn't still apologize.

-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 06-12-2008 10:57
Titre et anonymat


Réponse: Bébés / (correction) de flavie31, postée le 06-12-2008 à 12:48:31 (S | E)
Désolée pour le nom de la personne


Réponse: Bébés / (correction) de violet91, postée le 06-12-2008 à 13:19:53 (S | E)
Hello flavie...yes this fact is incredible!...

I'm going to talk about an incredible and pathetic story in Serrano's family.
The first last December, xxx, a woman of thirty-two years, lodged a complain against the owners of a clinic in xxx. She noticed, four years ago, that her daughter wasn't her biological child .
The fourth of July 1994, Sophie gives birth to a little girl who has a jaundice. The mother and baby are separated during a week for treating the baby in a special room. When the mother and her baby returned in their house, Sophie smelt a rat because her daughter had more hair than she was born.
However, doctors and paediatricians maintened it was absolutely normal.
The years passed and the skin of the little girl became more mate. Sophie explained this phenomenon by her Spanish origins but the father had doubts about his paternity and request a DNA test. They learned that they are neither of them parents of the girl.
Babies were exchanged fourteen years ago.
After a police investigation, she found her real daughter but they are very different.
Sophie recognized her adopted daughter, legally, but she suffers from this situation and she feels guilty of not having insisted with the doctors
I have chosen this subject because it is an incredibly and sad story. I am shocked that the affair is closed and that the private hospital doesn't still apologize.


Les éléments surlignés méritent des retouches : voc.,conjugaisons, ordre des mots, concordance des temps...
See you..violet


Réponse: Bébés / (correction) de flavie31, postée le 06-12-2008 à 13:37:29 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup pour cette correction .J'ai corrigé mes erreurs mais je ne comprends pas pour " four years ago" et " fourteen years ago".. Ca ne se dit pas ?


Flavie


Réponse: Bébés / (correction) de violet91, postée le 06-12-2008 à 14:00:29 (S | E)
Si..mais l'événement (échange de bébés) a eu lieu il y a six ans (ds les dx emplois). A case...Neither of them was..violet.


Réponse: Bébés / (correction) de flavie31, postée le 06-12-2008 à 14:56:34 (S | E)
Mmm .. l'échange a eu lieu il y a 14 ans en 1994.
Et il y a 4 ans ( en 2004), elle a fait le test ADN.


Réponse: Bébés / (correction) de flavie31, postée le 06-12-2008 à 15:05:14 (S | E)
I'm going to talk about an incredible and pathetic story in Serrano family.
The first December 2008, Sophie,a thirty-two year old woman, lodged a complain against the owners of a clinic in xxx. She was noticed, four years ago, that her daughter wasn't her biological child .
The fourth of July 1994, Sophie gaves birth to a little girl who had a jaundice. The mother and baby were separated during a week for treating the baby in a special room. When the mother and her baby come back home, Sophie smelt a rat because her daughter had more hair than she was born.
However, doctors and paediatricians maintened it was absolutely normal.
Years passed and the skin of the little girl became more mate. Sophie explained this phenomenon by her Spanish origins but the father had doubts about his paternity and requested a DNA test. They learned that they were neither parents of the girl.
Babies were exchanged fourteen years ago.
After a police investigation, she found her real daughter but they are very different.
Sophie recognized her adopted daughter, legally, but she suffers from this situation and she feels guilty of not having insisted with the doctors
I have chosen this subject because it is an incredible and sad story. I am shocked that thid matter is closed and that the private hospital doesn't still apologize. When I saw the movie " L'empreinte de l'ange", I made a connection between this story and the film.


Réponse: Bébés / (correction) de violet91, postée le 06-12-2008 à 15:22:32 (S | E)
Well done..to be guilty for (like responsible for : très moralisateur),neither of them is.., the hospital emploie de nombreuses personnes (= police, army, justice..) + pl. I am going..


Réponse: Bébés / (correction) de flavie31, postée le 06-12-2008 à 15:27:36 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup violet !! =)

Flavie




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