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Sujet pour l' oral /correction
Message de xsadg posté le 30-06-2009 à 23:28:10 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je suis sur le point de passer un oral très important pour mes études, et il m'est demandé de présenter l'entreprise dans lequel j'ai effectué mon alternance pendant une année (entreprise de téléphonie).
Malheureusement, je n'ai jamais été très bon en anglais et je sollicite votre aide pour corriger, je l'imagine, mes nombreuses fautes. Il y a des termes techniques mais ce qui m'intéresse c'est plutot la tournure générale des phrases.
Voici ce que j'ai rédigé :
Good afternoon Gentlemen, I will start this presentation by a part in English and then I will I switch in French. The aim of this presentation is to present to you a part of my work in XXTELECOM Corporation.
This part concerns the voice over IP and the implementation of strategy IP Centrex.
This presentation is divided into 4 main parts :
First, I will present the company XXTELECOM IS who welcomed me during that year of study.
In the second part of my talk, I will present to you what is the voice over IP and its various strategies of stake in work.
After that, I will speak about the practical aspect of the implementation of this one.
Finally, I hereby present my assessment of this year.
As I told you, the company where I have done my ASUR's Bachelor Degree in sandwich course is called XXTELECOM. This is a company who was set up in Nineteen ninety-nine (1999) by four persons specialize in telecommunication. Since this date, IS telecom knew a regular development.
Today, the company operates throughout France, and more particularly in the Southeast with more than 1700 customers.
The main activity of the society is the installation and configuration of telephony system for companies as well as all the associated devices.
In 2001, the company XXTELECOM decided to diversify his activities by starting to work on computer networks, a sector at the time in full expansion.
In 2008, while the company already working with IP telephony, XXTELECOM launches its own solution named AGIL OFFICE. It was developed with the help of one of its partners.
Despite initial problems related to the economic crisis, the solution begins to be marketed.
The staff is among 40 employees, divided into the following major sites:
….
Well now this part in english is over, i will continue in French.
-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 30-06-2009 23:39
Divers
Message de xsadg posté le 30-06-2009 à 23:28:10 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je suis sur le point de passer un oral très important pour mes études, et il m'est demandé de présenter l'entreprise dans lequel j'ai effectué mon alternance pendant une année (entreprise de téléphonie).
Malheureusement, je n'ai jamais été très bon en anglais et je sollicite votre aide pour corriger, je l'imagine, mes nombreuses fautes. Il y a des termes techniques mais ce qui m'intéresse c'est plutot la tournure générale des phrases.
Voici ce que j'ai rédigé :
Good afternoon Gentlemen, I will start this presentation by a part in English and then I will I switch in French. The aim of this presentation is to present to you a part of my work in XXTELECOM Corporation.
This part concerns the voice over IP and the implementation of strategy IP Centrex.
This presentation is divided into 4 main parts :
First, I will present the company XXTELECOM IS who welcomed me during that year of study.
In the second part of my talk, I will present to you what is the voice over IP and its various strategies of stake in work.
After that, I will speak about the practical aspect of the implementation of this one.
Finally, I hereby present my assessment of this year.
As I told you, the company where I have done my ASUR's Bachelor Degree in sandwich course is called XXTELECOM. This is a company who was set up in Nineteen ninety-nine (1999) by four persons specialize in telecommunication. Since this date, IS telecom knew a regular development.
Today, the company operates throughout France, and more particularly in the Southeast with more than 1700 customers.
The main activity of the society is the installation and configuration of telephony system for companies as well as all the associated devices.
In 2001, the company XXTELECOM decided to diversify his activities by starting to work on computer networks, a sector at the time in full expansion.
In 2008, while the company already working with IP telephony, XXTELECOM launches its own solution named AGIL OFFICE. It was developed with the help of one of its partners.
Despite initial problems related to the economic crisis, the solution begins to be marketed.
The staff is among 40 employees, divided into the following major sites:
….
Well now this part in english is over, i will continue in French.
-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 30-06-2009 23:39
Divers
Réponse: Sujet pour l' oral /correction de seb06000, postée le 01-07-2009 à 10:04:08 (S | E)
Voici les éléments corrigés:
Good afternoon Gentlemen, I will first start my presentation in English, then I shall turn to French. The aim of this presentation is to present you a part of my work in XXTELECOM Corporation.
This part concerns the voice over IP and the implementation of strategy IP Centrex.
This presentation is divided into 4 main parts :
First, I will present the company XXTELECOM IS which welcomed me during that year of study.
In the second part of my talk, I will present to you what the voice over IP is and its various strategies of stake at work.
After that, I will speak about the practical aspect of the implementation of the latter.
Finally, I hereby present my assessment of this year.
As I told you, the company where I have done my ASUR's Bachelor Degree in sandwich course is called XXTELECOM. This is a company which was set up in Nineteen ninety-nine (1999) by four persons specialized in telecommunication. Since this date, IS telecom has known a regular development.
Today, the company operates throughout France, and more particularly in the Southeast with more than 1700 customers.
The main activity of the society is the installation and configuration of telephony system for companies as well as all the associated devices.
In 2001, the company XXTELECOM decided to diversify its activities by starting to work on computer networks, a sector in full expansion at the time.
In 2008, while the company was already working with IP telephony, XXTELECOM launched its own solution named AGIL OFFICE. It was developed with the help of one of its partners.
Despite initial problems related to the economic crisis, the solution begins to be marketed.
The staff is among 40 employees, divided into the following major sites:
….
Well now this part in English is over, I will now turn to French.
Voilà s'il y a des questions, n'hésitez pas!
Amicalement
sébastien
Réponse: Sujet pour l' oral /correction de xsadg, postée le 01-07-2009 à 12:31:21 (S | E)
Bonjour,
Merci pour cette correction .
Si d'autres personnes remarque des anomalies, ne vous génez pas !