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Correction - Authority
Message de l0urax posté le 24-04-2010 à 14:44:00 (S | E | F)
Bonjour, j'aimerais de l'aide pour un exercice de rédaction. Je viens de taper un texte, et j'aimerais savoir si il y a des fautes. Je vous remercie d'avance
Relationship between parents and children have completely changed. On account of these new technologies, wheter internet or phones, alcohol, or parties (with drugs, cigarettes). I think, because of that, the adults have lost their aurotrity. They are afraid of them children. it's .. regrettable, the parents feel less and less obliged to "put" limits. they are more and more numerous to go to see psychologist, they expect to have a .. miracle. the parents have more and more problems, money troubles (economic crisis, the rise in unemployment). They don't want any more to complicate things to educate them children. That is why, that the children have have a total freedom. these parents have it enough, they leave their children free. I don't say that all the parents are irresponsible. Certains still have values, they bring up their children. They puts limits, (tout en leur laissant ?) a minimum of freedom. they have the intention of sending them children in a good school. everything begins in the education.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 24-04-2010 16:59
orthographe du titre
Message de l0urax posté le 24-04-2010 à 14:44:00 (S | E | F)
Bonjour, j'aimerais de l'aide pour un exercice de rédaction. Je viens de taper un texte, et j'aimerais savoir si il y a des fautes. Je vous remercie d'avance
Relationship between parents and children have completely changed. On account of these new technologies, wheter internet or phones, alcohol, or parties (with drugs, cigarettes). I think, because of that, the adults have lost their aurotrity. They are afraid of them children. it's .. regrettable, the parents feel less and less obliged to "put" limits. they are more and more numerous to go to see psychologist, they expect to have a .. miracle. the parents have more and more problems, money troubles (economic crisis, the rise in unemployment). They don't want any more to complicate things to educate them children. That is why, that the children have have a total freedom. these parents have it enough, they leave their children free. I don't say that all the parents are irresponsible. Certains still have values, they bring up their children. They puts limits, (tout en leur laissant ?) a minimum of freedom. they have the intention of sending them children in a good school. everything begins in the education.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 24-04-2010 16:59
orthographe du titre
Réponse: Correction - Authority de notrepere, postée le 24-04-2010 à 20:15:03 (S | E)
Hello:To begin...
[definite article]Relationship between parents and children have (the subject is "relationship" not "parents and children") completely changed.
Before we work on the sentence structure, you should fix the problems highlighted below:
On account of these new technologies, wheter internet or phones, alcohol, or parties (with drugs, cigarettes). I think, because of that, the adults have lost their aurotrity. They are afraid of them children. it's .. regrettable, the parents feel less and less obliged to "put" limits. they are more and more numerous to go to see psychologist, they expect to have a .. miracle. the parents have more and more problems, money troubles (economic crisis, the rise in unemployment). They don't want any more to complicate things to educate them children. That is why, that the children have have a total freedom. these parents have it enough, they leave their children free. I don't say that all the parents are irresponsible. Certains still have values, they bring up their children. They puts limits, (tout en leur laissant ?) a minimum of freedom. they have the intention of sending them children in a good school. everything begins in the education.
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Modifié par notrepere le 24-04-2010 20:19
Réponse: Correction - Authority de l0urax, postée le 25-04-2010 à 11:29:30 (S | E)
Voilà, j'ai corrigé les fautes
On account of these new technologies, whether internet or phones, alcohol, or parties (with drugs, cigarettes). I think, because of that, the adults have lost their authority. They are afraid of their children. it's .. regrettable, the parents feel less and less obliged to "put" limits. they are more and more numerous to go to see psychologist, they expect to have a .. miracle. the parents have more and more problems, money troubles (economic crisis, the rise in unemployment). They don't want any more to complicate things to educate their children. That is why, that the children have a total freedom. these parents have it enough, they leave their children free. I don't say that all the parents are irresponsible. Some still have values, they bring up their children. They put limits, (tout en leur laissant ?) a minimum of freedom. they have the intention of sending their children in a good school. everything begins in the education.
Réponse: Correction - Authority de l0urax, postée le 25-04-2010 à 11:32:23 (S | E)
J'ai oublié celle-ci
Relationship between parents and children has completely changed.
Réponse: Correction - Authority de notrepere, postée le 25-04-2010 à 16:51:25 (S | E)
Hello:You forgot The relationship...
On account of these new technologies, whether internet or phones, alcohol, or parties (with drugs, cigarettes) It would be better to start this sentence with something like: I believe this is ... and "such as" instead of "whether"
They are afraid of their children. it's .. regrettable, This completes one idea, so maybe something like ...of their children which is regrettable. Then you can start the next sentence with The parents...
In American English, we would say "set" limits. I don't know about GBE.]
they are more and more numerous to go to see psychologist, they expect to have a .. miracle.
The parents have (utilise le présent continu more and more problems
They don't want any more to complicate things to educate their children. I don't understand this statement. Maybe if you could write it in French, I will understand it better
That is why, that the children have a total freedom.
these parents have it (do you mean "have had"?) enough, they leave their children free.
I don't say (utilise "to say" au présent continu au négatif) that all the parents are irresponsible.
Some still have values, they bring up their children. Some of them still have values which they instill in their children.
They put (have set?) limits, (tout en leur laissant ?)?? a minimum of freedom. They have the intention of sending their children
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