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Journée type/correction
Message de misschanelle posté le 17-09-2011 à 14:31:14 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je dois écrire une journée type en anglais pour lundi. Voici se que j'ai fait et pouvez-vous dire si je suis dans le bon et s'il y a encore des choses à ajouter?
Merci pour vos réponses.
I usually wake up at 9 in the morning, I get up at 9h10 am and then I dress. I walk in the "ravel" with my dog before 10 am because a catch the bus at 10 o'clock. I practise the horse riding every day ( because I have got two horses), I'm back at home (je suis de retour à la maison) at 3h30 pm. I have got a shower, I dress next a occasionaly watch tv or read a book after I have a diner at 7 at nignt . After I go in my bedroom because I do my homeworks until 9h30pm and then I go to sleep because I very busy life.
In my free times, I like listen to music, go to cinema and take photography. Once or twice a week I help my mother at the haidresser's (j'aide ma maman au salon de coiffure)
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Modifié par lucile83 le 17-09-2011 14:36
Message de misschanelle posté le 17-09-2011 à 14:31:14 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je dois écrire une journée type en anglais pour lundi. Voici se que j'ai fait et pouvez-vous dire si je suis dans le bon et s'il y a encore des choses à ajouter?
Merci pour vos réponses.
I usually wake up at 9 in the morning, I get up at 9h10 am and then I dress. I walk in the "ravel" with my dog before 10 am because a catch the bus at 10 o'clock. I practise the horse riding every day ( because I have got two horses), I'm back at home (je suis de retour à la maison) at 3h30 pm. I have got a shower, I dress next a occasionaly watch tv or read a book after I have a diner at 7 at nignt . After I go in my bedroom because I do my homeworks until 9h30pm and then I go to sleep because I very busy life.
In my free times, I like listen to music, go to cinema and take photography. Once or twice a week I help my mother at the haidresser's (j'aide ma maman au salon de coiffure)
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Modifié par lucile83 le 17-09-2011 14:36
Réponse: Journée type/correction de sherry48, postée le 17-09-2011 à 15:45:16 (S | E)
Hello misschanelle.
I have not corrected punctuation. If you have a complete thought, (with a subject and a verb), use a period. Don't use a comma (or 'and', unless the 2 are closely related) to create long run on sentences. If a word is in blue without explanation, check the spelling.
I usually wake up at 9 (9:00) in the morning, I get up at 9h10 am and then I dress (or get dressed). I walk in the "ravel"? with my dog before 10 am (capitals) because a catch the bus at 10 o'clock. I practise
In my free times, I like listen (infinitive) to music, go to (article) cinema and take photography (if you take photography it means you are taking a class...or did you mean take photos?). Once or twice a week I help my mother at the haidresser's
**If you just say after, you change slightly the meaning of the sentence. After I go in my bedroom,...means you go to your bedroom next, then you do homework (you can't use because)...After dinner, I go in my bedroom means you eat dinner, then go to your bedroom (because is ok).
That's all...Sherry
Réponse: Journée type/correction de silky, postée le 17-09-2011 à 18:07:17 (S | E)
Hello Misschanelle,
As I live near Liège like you, I understand what your sentence "I walk in the ravel with my dog" means but as you can see Sherry 48 put a question mark after this sentence. What about writing "I walk on a path along the river with my dog"?
I am sure Sherry 48 can't wait to know what you mean by Ravel!! Here is a short explanation for you Sherry
Le RAVeL, Réseau Autonome de Voies Lentes, a été instauré en octobre 1995 dans la partie sud de la Belgique. Son but est de réaliser un réseau d’itinéraires réservés aux piétons, cyclistes, personnes à mobilité réduite et aux cavaliers, là où la situation le permet. Les itinéraires RAVeL se veulent des lieux de convivialité entre les différents usagers. Ce réseau empruntera des chemins de halage et des voies ferrées désaffectées.L’objectif est à terme de couvrir la plus grande partie de la Wallonie, avec des itinéraires constituant l’ossature du réseau, auxquels viendront se raccorder d’autres itinéraires.
All the best to both of you
Réponse: Journée type/correction de sherry48, postée le 17-09-2011 à 18:20:17 (S | E)
Hello silky.
Thanks for your explanation. I got the general idea now.
SherryRéponse: Journée type/correction de misschanelle, postée le 17-09-2011 à 20:35:12 (S | E)
Merci à tous pour vos réponses ;je vais réécrire une fois mon texte pour voir s'il n'y a plus rien à corriger.
I usually wake up at 9h00 in the morning, I get up at 9h10 AM and then I get dressed. I walk on the path along the river with my dog before 10 AM because a catch the bus at 10 o'clock. I practise the backhorse every day ( because I have two horses), I'm back at home at 3h30 PM. I have a shower, I get dressed a occasionaly watch tv or read a book after I have diner at 7 at nignt. I do my homeworks in my bedroom until 9h30PM and then I go to sleep because I have a very busy life.
In my free times, I listen to music, go to cinema and take photos. Once or twice a week I help my mother at the haidresser's.
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Modifié par misschanelle le 17-09-2011 20:35
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Modifié par lucile83 le 17-09-2011 20:42
Réponse: Journée type/correction de sherry48, postée le 17-09-2011 à 21:18:30 (S | E)
Hello misschanelle.
You have just a few corrections that you missed.
I usually wake up at 9h00 in the morning, I get up at 9h10 AM and then I get dressed. I walk on the path along the river with my dog before 10 AM because a catch the bus at 10 o'clock. I practise
In my free time
The correct format for time is 10:00 AM.
Sherry
Réponse: Journée type/correction de willy, postée le 18-09-2011 à 07:59:43 (S | E)
Hello!
I'd change the last sentence:
My mother is a hairdresser and I help her once or twice a week.
Réponse: Journée type/correction de misschanelle, postée le 18-09-2011 à 17:57:32 (S | E)
Merci à tous pour votre aide et vos corrections.
Bonne fin d'après-midi
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