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Message de brembo posté le 10-12-2013 à 10:43:27 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous,
je viens de faire un des textes pour l'oral d'anglais du bac (5mn), dites-moisvp s'il vous plaît ce que je peux améliorer, s'il y a des fautes, etc.
Merci beaucoup.
The notion which I’m going to present is the Myth and heroes. The myth is connected with the human condition as a whole and it helps humans to understand and explain their condition, the world in which they live. The myth is often made of stories represented by a heroes. That’s why we can speak about the notion of “myths and heroes”. A hero in mythology and folklore, a person of superhuman qualifies who is admired for his courage or extraordinary achievements. In the modern world, a hero has lost its ancient meaning. It now means someone who is courageous. They help people or society like superman or batman. Sometimes, the main character of a story is called a « hero ».
To illustrate this notion, I’m going to lean on three documents. Those documents include texts and picture, all connected in the United States. Actually, it is a mythical country how many people have dreamed of going there, either to visit or to stay ? Many indeed. Everything is bigger, everything is possible. It is a dream, the American Dream. Then the myth has its heroes of course. I chose these documents to show whom is hero.
The first document that I chose is an extract of "Dance with wolves" of Michael Blake. This text shows a peaceful relation between a white American soldier, the role of which is to fight the Indians on the path westward, and the inhabitants of an Indian tribe. The central figure is John Dunbar. He saves a wounded Indian young woman and returns her to the village and realizes that he is seen as an invader. They don’t thank him for having saved this Indian. This is normal because Indians is battling against the whites who appropriate their territories. Here we have a vision different from the conquering and violent white hero, who refuses to conform to the majority of the soldiers from whom the role is to protect the whites and to exterminate the Indians. The soldier considers the Natives as human beings, brothers and not enemies. The American western myth and of his heroes evolved. John Dunbar is supposed to be the hero of the white colonists. But in this book he becomes a kind of anti-hero because he passes on the side of Indians and becomes their hero, their protector. Lieutenant Dunbar, considered as an army deserter, supported the Indians.
Let’s move on to the picture of the president of the United States Martin Luther King during its speech "I have a dream". He pronounced it twenty eight in August one thousand nine hundred sixty three, in front of the Lincoln famous Memorial (sixteenth president of the United States, famous to have ended the American Civil War and abolished the slavery), in Washington D.C. He has become a hero fighting for the blacks' Civil Rights in the years one thousand nine hundred fifty - one thousand nine hundred sixty. His charisma makes him a hero. Furthermore, he is a master in delivering speeches, he knew how to rouse the crowds, as we can notice it on the picture, he was also a non-violent fighter. Martin Luther King has become an icon of the fight for equality in the USA and all over the world and many people still refer to him. His speech "I have a dream" was even taken back in a song, by Dutch, there is less than year, still showing the impact and his popularity on our world fifty years later ! It’s a great myth that many Americans have in common, there is a Martin Luther King day on the third Monday of January; it is a public holiday. Furthermore, he was assassinated in one thousand nine hundred sixty eight, heroes often die tragically and violently. This leads me to say a few words about his famous speech.
The main myth of the American culture is the American dream. The title of his speech “I have a dream“ will recall the notion of the American dream of the immigrants, the speech will talk about equality and brotherhood. It reminds the Americans that they are one nation and all of its people must have the same rights. King takes his images from the Bible because he is a pastor used to religious references : The table of brotherhood, using repeatedly the word faith, but also the word pray, and God's name. Martin Luther King’s style is effective because he is able to move his audience into action. He stirs their emotions by well-known effects of rhetoric. Not only does he speak from his heart but he speaks with skill. He has learnt rhetoric, that is the technique of making speeches in his works as a pastor and he uses rhetorical devices, such as symbolism and imagery. He becomes a kind of new prophet preaching from the top of a mountain. He becomes one hero in the fight for Civil Rights.
To conclude, I would say that people need guidance, to look up to some kind of role model. But the values they embody are those of our society. Myths and heroes have changed our lives. Real or not real, they have a capacity to change the minds of many people, to help them and to change the course of history. They do courageous things, they fight for something or they want to serve others. They represent a model, an ideal person. And nobody can deny their comportment, they changed the history, our history.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 10-12-2013 11:02
Message de brembo posté le 10-12-2013 à 10:43:27 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous,
je viens de faire un des textes pour l'oral d'anglais du bac (5mn), dites-moi
Merci beaucoup.
The notion which I’m going to present is the Myth and heroes. The myth is connected with the human condition as a whole and it helps humans to understand and explain their condition, the world in which they live. The myth is often made of stories represented by a heroes. That’s why we can speak about the notion of “myths and heroes”. A hero in mythology and folklore, a person of superhuman qualifies who is admired for his courage or extraordinary achievements. In the modern world, a hero has lost its ancient meaning. It now means someone who is courageous. They help people or society like superman or batman. Sometimes, the main character of a story is called a « hero ».
To illustrate this notion, I’m going to lean on three documents. Those documents include texts and picture, all connected in the United States. Actually, it is a mythical country how many people have dreamed of going there, either to visit or to stay ? Many indeed. Everything is bigger, everything is possible. It is a dream, the American Dream. Then the myth has its heroes of course. I chose these documents to show whom is hero.
The first document that I chose is an extract of "Dance with wolves" of Michael Blake. This text shows a peaceful relation between a white American soldier, the role of which is to fight the Indians on the path westward, and the inhabitants of an Indian tribe. The central figure is John Dunbar. He saves a wounded Indian young woman and returns her to the village and realizes that he is seen as an invader. They don’t thank him for having saved this Indian. This is normal because Indians is battling against the whites who appropriate their territories. Here we have a vision different from the conquering and violent white hero, who refuses to conform to the majority of the soldiers from whom the role is to protect the whites and to exterminate the Indians. The soldier considers the Natives as human beings, brothers and not enemies. The American western myth and of his heroes evolved. John Dunbar is supposed to be the hero of the white colonists. But in this book he becomes a kind of anti-hero because he passes on the side of Indians and becomes their hero, their protector. Lieutenant Dunbar, considered as an army deserter, supported the Indians.
Let’s move on to the picture of the president of the United States Martin Luther King during its speech "I have a dream". He pronounced it twenty eight in August one thousand nine hundred sixty three, in front of the Lincoln famous Memorial (sixteenth president of the United States, famous to have ended the American Civil War and abolished the slavery), in Washington D.C. He has become a hero fighting for the blacks' Civil Rights in the years one thousand nine hundred fifty - one thousand nine hundred sixty. His charisma makes him a hero. Furthermore, he is a master in delivering speeches, he knew how to rouse the crowds, as we can notice it on the picture, he was also a non-violent fighter. Martin Luther King has become an icon of the fight for equality in the USA and all over the world and many people still refer to him. His speech "I have a dream" was even taken back in a song, by Dutch, there is less than year, still showing the impact and his popularity on our world fifty years later ! It’s a great myth that many Americans have in common, there is a Martin Luther King day on the third Monday of January; it is a public holiday. Furthermore, he was assassinated in one thousand nine hundred sixty eight, heroes often die tragically and violently. This leads me to say a few words about his famous speech.
The main myth of the American culture is the American dream. The title of his speech “I have a dream“ will recall the notion of the American dream of the immigrants, the speech will talk about equality and brotherhood. It reminds the Americans that they are one nation and all of its people must have the same rights. King takes his images from the Bible because he is a pastor used to religious references : The table of brotherhood, using repeatedly the word faith, but also the word pray, and God's name. Martin Luther King’s style is effective because he is able to move his audience into action. He stirs their emotions by well-known effects of rhetoric. Not only does he speak from his heart but he speaks with skill. He has learnt rhetoric, that is the technique of making speeches in his works as a pastor and he uses rhetorical devices, such as symbolism and imagery. He becomes a kind of new prophet preaching from the top of a mountain. He becomes one hero in the fight for Civil Rights.
To conclude, I would say that people need guidance, to look up to some kind of role model. But the values they embody are those of our society. Myths and heroes have changed our lives. Real or not real, they have a capacity to change the minds of many people, to help them and to change the course of history. They do courageous things, they fight for something or they want to serve others. They represent a model, an ideal person. And nobody can deny their comportment, they changed the history, our history.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 10-12-2013 11:02
Réponse: Myth and heroes/aide de bluduck2, postée le 11-12-2013 à 17:00:07 (S | E)
Hello bembo ,I suggest revising__ the use of articles :--a myth , the myth , myths (§1);--a slave , slavery (§4)
__ the relative pronoun whose (§3 line 1 and line 4)[]
__les prépositions on+date ,to connect to ,to have an impact over.
__il y a +qq années
Here are a few mistakes you can easily correct[noir]:In the first paragraph , a hero ,several heroes ,line 3,qualities
In the second paragraph ,try and find another verb to replace "to lean" .
In the third paragraph ,relationship , the Indians (pluriel) are
line 5,myth (neutre)--its
The sentence(line 4) in which you mention M.L.King is not clear .The Presidents were JFK and L.B.Johnson .
In the fourth paragraph :Because he was a clergyman, M.L.K. knew how to write (and say) sermons .
Look up the word "comportement"(last line) in the dictionary.
As for your conclusion, it says roughly the same as your introduction.I suggest writing a more original conclusion (for the examiner to appreciate your presentation)
Hope this helps ! Bluduck2
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