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Message de sckar posté le 19-12-2013 à 14:11:36 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
Tout d'abord merci du temps que vous accorderez à la lecture de mon travail. Pourriez-vous s'il vous plaît regarder ce que j'ai déjà fait et essayer de me corriger. Je me suis relu plusieurs fois mais ayant quelques lacunes du collège, je ne suis pas sûr de quelques tournures de phrases, surtout vers la fin. Toute remarque/correction sera accueillie avec plaisir.
The Freedom Riders is a determined group of civil rights activists who defend rights for black people in the 1960, they are rebels overlooked the Jim Crow's laws. They denounce the segregation in the United States specially in the South, they fight back for the equality between blacks and whites in a bus, their bus went from Washington D.C. to Jackson. During their trip, they meet a hostile mob with violent people who have metal poles and other accessories for intimidate the defenceless people in the bus. They are not afraid because it's their challenge and they aren't fearful but courageous because it's a fair fight. The mob is threatening, ready for beath to death a bold Riders, at the same time the Riders are not terrorized for demonstrate deliberately they are ready to sacrifice oneself for their ideal after have overcome barriers. They are forbidden to trip in this bus because they have a melting pot between blacks and whites.
Merci d'avance et cordialement.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 19-12-2013 14:16
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Modifié par sckar le 19-12-2013 17:49
Message de sckar posté le 19-12-2013 à 14:11:36 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
Tout d'abord merci du temps que vous accorderez à la lecture de mon travail. Pourriez-vous s'il vous plaît regarder ce que j'ai déjà fait et essayer de me corriger. Je me suis relu plusieurs fois mais ayant quelques lacunes du collège, je ne suis pas sûr de quelques tournures de phrases, surtout vers la fin. Toute remarque/correction sera accueillie avec plaisir.
The Freedom Riders is a determined group of civil rights activists who defend rights for black people in the 1960, they are rebels overlooked the Jim Crow's laws. They denounce the segregation in the United States specially in the South, they fight back for the equality between blacks and whites in a bus, their bus went from Washington D.C. to Jackson. During their trip, they meet a hostile mob with violent people who have metal poles and other accessories for intimidate the defenceless people in the bus. They are not afraid because it's their challenge and they aren't fearful but courageous because it's a fair fight. The mob is threatening, ready for beath to death a bold Riders, at the same time the Riders are not terrorized for demonstrate deliberately they are ready to sacrifice oneself for their ideal after have overcome barriers. They are forbidden to trip in this bus because they have a melting pot between blacks and whites.
Merci d'avance et cordialement.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 19-12-2013 14:16
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Modifié par sckar le 19-12-2013 17:49
Réponse: Grammaire /conjugaison de bluduck2, postée le 19-12-2013 à 21:21:51 (S | E)
Hello sckar !
Because this event took place in the 1960ies, you must use the simple past !
Check the regular verbs :to defend, to denounce and the irregular verbs;to be ,to fight ,to have, to meet (second column in the list)
Check FOR+Verb+ing
As far as vocabulary is concerned ,"voyager" is to travel ,un voyage is "a trip" .
Check the meaning of "to overlook " Do you mean "they protested against, they refused ..."?
What do you mean by "beath" ?
In your last sentence,you wrote "melting pot" and I suppose you meant "segregation"(In the 60ies,racial segregation existed in the South,in every public place)
Hope this helps !
Bluduck2
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