Correction/ Mythes et héros
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Message de dadoush35 posté le 06-05-2014 à 22:42:50 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je suis en terminale Littéraire et comme beaucoup d'entre vous, je vais passer mon oral d'anglais.
J'ai fait une notion pour l'instant : mythes et héros.
Pourriez-vous, s'il vous plaît, m'aider à corriger la grammaire et me dire ce que vous pensez de ce que j'ai mis ?
Merci
Introduction :
First, Education is a fundamental human right : each children can get it. It is the action to develop a set of knowledge and moral, physical, intellectual, scientific values. Education enables to transmit from one generation to another the culture, the history...
It is based on the family, school, society, but also on personal readings and the use of media such as television or the Internet.
Now I will get a definition, for me, from a heroe. It can have different significations like :
- A god, a mythological character, a character with super-power. They are fictive characters.
- A person who has the main character in a history.
- And the one which interrest us : the real person who has bravery, not super-power, a normal person but who make good actions, and actions which can change a society, the world...
We will show how can we say the education is the gate to become an heroe, and for this, I will use three documents :
Video : Dead Poets Society (First scene)
Malala : Article in the BBC news magazine (C.E)
Steve Jobs : Commencement Speech (C.O Video)
Développement :
I – Education enables to have a point of view about the world and so we can make change the wolrd with our own ideas.
I'm going to present the first document. It's an article from the BBC News Magazine, from 10 October 2012. It's about Malala, a Pakistanese girl.
FACT : The Taliban issued an edict banning all girls from School. More than half of the class stopped attending school (11 left out 27). Militants destroyed 150 schools in 2008, and her school closed down in 2009.
She started a blog in order to describe what her life was like, living under Taliban rule in the north west of Pakistan. She also wanted to speak out, and to let everybody know about the hardships she was going through, therefore she wrote anonymously, otherwise she would have been killed immediately.
She mainly wrote about the conditions of education in her area and her fear of being killed by the Taliban if she went an attending school. She also feared the closure of her school, which happened anyway in January 2009.
She objects to the Taliban's prohibition of female education and their destruction of schools. It makes her feel angry as she is offended by such an unfair edict. Although she was scared to get killed at the time, she decided that she should speak out to stand up for this basic right : Education for everyone.
She probably believes in education as a gate to freedom and self-fulfiillment which is why the Taliban and their Sharia banned it. She cannot comply to that rule stating that girls shouldn't be educated.
It's no allow at all by the Sharia writing a blog. According the BBC article, Malala has taken huge risks. She has put her life into danger when she decided to challenge the Taliban laws and fights for the right of girls to be educated.
Her fight for education equality reveals how important Education is for her. She deeply thinks that a country which wants to progress or emerge is a country where boys and girls are given the same education opportunities.
Society can only evolve if girls are granted the same rights to knowledge. The lack of education for girls enables the Taliban to go on imposing an unfair model of society, where women will still oppressed and persecuted and where men will hold on to their ruling power and priviledges. It will only widen the gender gap. Education is an opening to sharing equal power between males and females. Malala has understood quite early that Education is power and this power is what frightens the Taliban. Therefore ther are determined to deprive girls from education, to maintain them in a state of dependency and ignorance. They use fear to fight their own fear. If the women can't have such education, they are not free because they can't have the right to choose their future job, they will have to take the worst job, the one who nobody wants.
II – Education is the way to be famous, rich, free.
The second document is a video that we saw in class. It was the commencement speech of Steve Job. It takes place in the USA, in Stanford (South of San Francisco). It's located in the Silicon Valley (famous for its coputer technology). Steve Job is the director of Apple and Pixar.
This is a graduation day and there is faculty university people (teachers, students...)
Steve Job sounds serious, he is pleard to talk to the students agbout his experience. He use humor, repetitions and a little eye contact. The speech is attractive. He may be ill at ease but he looks quite relax and comfortable. He speaks truly (giving intimate details of his private life). The audience looks captivated, focused on what he's saying.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 07-05-2014 00:10
Message de dadoush35 posté le 06-05-2014 à 22:42:50 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je suis en terminale Littéraire et comme beaucoup d'entre vous, je vais passer mon oral d'anglais.
J'ai fait une notion pour l'instant : mythes et héros.
Pourriez-vous, s'il vous plaît, m'aider à corriger la grammaire et me dire ce que vous pensez de ce que j'ai mis ?
Merci
Introduction :
First, Education is a fundamental human right : each children can get it. It is the action to develop a set of knowledge and moral, physical, intellectual, scientific values. Education enables to transmit from one generation to another the culture, the history...
It is based on the family, school, society, but also on personal readings and the use of media such as television or the Internet.
Now I will get a definition, for me, from a heroe. It can have different significations like :
- A god, a mythological character, a character with super-power. They are fictive characters.
- A person who has the main character in a history.
- And the one which interrest us : the real person who has bravery, not super-power, a normal person but who make good actions, and actions which can change a society, the world...
We will show how can we say the education is the gate to become an heroe, and for this, I will use three documents :
Video : Dead Poets Society (First scene)
Malala : Article in the BBC news magazine (C.E)
Steve Jobs : Commencement Speech (C.O Video)
Développement :
I – Education enables to have a point of view about the world and so we can make change the wolrd with our own ideas.
I'm going to present the first document. It's an article from the BBC News Magazine, from 10 October 2012. It's about Malala, a Pakistanese girl.
FACT : The Taliban issued an edict banning all girls from School. More than half of the class stopped attending school (11 left out 27). Militants destroyed 150 schools in 2008, and her school closed down in 2009.
She started a blog in order to describe what her life was like, living under Taliban rule in the north west of Pakistan. She also wanted to speak out, and to let everybody know about the hardships she was going through, therefore she wrote anonymously, otherwise she would have been killed immediately.
She mainly wrote about the conditions of education in her area and her fear of being killed by the Taliban if she went an attending school. She also feared the closure of her school, which happened anyway in January 2009.
She objects to the Taliban's prohibition of female education and their destruction of schools. It makes her feel angry as she is offended by such an unfair edict. Although she was scared to get killed at the time, she decided that she should speak out to stand up for this basic right : Education for everyone.
She probably believes in education as a gate to freedom and self-fulfiillment which is why the Taliban and their Sharia banned it. She cannot comply to that rule stating that girls shouldn't be educated.
It's no allow at all by the Sharia writing a blog. According the BBC article, Malala has taken huge risks. She has put her life into danger when she decided to challenge the Taliban laws and fights for the right of girls to be educated.
Her fight for education equality reveals how important Education is for her. She deeply thinks that a country which wants to progress or emerge is a country where boys and girls are given the same education opportunities.
Society can only evolve if girls are granted the same rights to knowledge. The lack of education for girls enables the Taliban to go on imposing an unfair model of society, where women will still oppressed and persecuted and where men will hold on to their ruling power and priviledges. It will only widen the gender gap. Education is an opening to sharing equal power between males and females. Malala has understood quite early that Education is power and this power is what frightens the Taliban. Therefore ther are determined to deprive girls from education, to maintain them in a state of dependency and ignorance. They use fear to fight their own fear. If the women can't have such education, they are not free because they can't have the right to choose their future job, they will have to take the worst job, the one who nobody wants.
II – Education is the way to be famous, rich, free.
The second document is a video that we saw in class. It was the commencement speech of Steve Job. It takes place in the USA, in Stanford (South of San Francisco). It's located in the Silicon Valley (famous for its coputer technology). Steve Job is the director of Apple and Pixar.
This is a graduation day and there is faculty university people (teachers, students...)
Steve Job sounds serious, he is pleard to talk to the students agbout his experience. He use humor, repetitions and a little eye contact. The speech is attractive. He may be ill at ease but he looks quite relax and comfortable. He speaks truly (giving intimate details of his private life). The audience looks captivated, focused on what he's saying.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 07-05-2014 00:10
Réponse: Correction/ Mythes et héros de dadoush35, postée le 06-05-2014 à 22:43:50 (S | E)
ET LA SUITE :
He is here because he got education and it's because of that he get knowledge to create his mark. He is now free because he is famous, rich...
III - Education enables to be autoritary and to have knowledge
The last document is an extract of the movie « Dead Poets Society ». Mr Keating, a teacher of English Litterature is starting a course on Poetry, and he is presenting his views on what poetry is about. He wants his students to rip out the 1st part of the poetry book.
Some boys are quite writing to comply to Mr Keating's new rule. Some other boys, though, are reluctant to obey, they are surprised, shocked, by his provocative attitude.
“In my class you're going to learn to think by yourself”
“Words and ideas can change the world”
“We read poetry because we are members of the human race”
I agree with Mr Keating's view. They will become more mature and autonomous.
Other teacher seeing Mr Keating's method. He was upset, astonished, disturbed. In that sort of Public school, students are serious, tedious, they usually give in to the pressure for conformity (imposed by society).
→ Unlike the other teachers, Mr Keating is passionate, his methods are provocative, he is determined and “authoritary”
All of all documents ----> Education gives you access to culture and knowledge and help you to find role models when you're still young and uncertain about the choices you have to make. Knowledge gives you access to media and strategies you can master to achieve your goals → self-fulfillment, fighting for cause or keeping informed about what is happening in the world.
Merci encore
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