Aide /Cartoon

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Aide /Cartoon
Message de milasosa posté le 10-01-2015 à 09:46:52 (S | E | F)
Bonjour
est-ce possible de corriger mes fautes s'il vous plait ?
Merci beaucoup !

I choose of help me a cartoon where the name of the cartoonist is unkown. The scene takes place in a factory in a near future. There is a conveyor belt on which five men are standing four of these men are identical, their smiles look fake and in fact they look a little scary. The fifth man looks quite different from the other, he’s small ans skinny and is about to do throw in a dumpster because is not « perfect ». This document show that in near future there will be a selective breeding and the flaw will not be accepted. Thus everybody will be similar.
Moreover the second document is about genetically engineering babies, the text is about the possibly to « design your babies » that is to say enable people to selct their baby according to its characteristics. Such a technique would certainly change humanity since scientists would be able to eradicate some diseases which nowadays cause millions of deaths per years.

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Modifié par lucile83 le 10-01-2015 10:05

Réponse: Aide /Cartoon de bluduck2, postée le 10-01-2015 à 11:03:59 (S | E)
Bonjour Milasosa ,
Votre deuxième paragraphe est tout à fait correct . Par contre,il y a des fautes dans le premier.
Ligne 1 : employez "to choose" au simple past
Ligne 1 :"of" ,préposition, ne convient pas ici .
Ponctuez ! Coupez votre première phrase !
Evitez ce "in fact",traduit du français .Préférez "actually"
Ligne 2 :"les autres",pluriel .
Ligner 3 :pour dire "être jeté",il faut un passif (à voir dans Anglais Facile)
Ligne 3: un défaut:a flaw ; les défauts (déja mentionnés):the flaws ; les défauts en général :flaws .
I hope this helps!
Bluduck2

Réponse: Aide /Cartoon de gerondif, postée le 10-01-2015 à 12:47:42 (S | E)
Bonjour,
évitez de traduire mot-à-mot:
par exemple: j'ai choisi de me servir d'un dessin! de n'est pas of et help yourself signifie "servez-vous" dans un plat ou à un self-service.
Pareil pour: il va se faire jeter "do throw" ne va pas du tout.
Donc, ce que vous utilisez est bien écrit, ce que vous inventez ne l'est pas!
erreurs en bleu.

I choose of help me a cartoon where the name of the cartoonist is unkown. The scene takes place in a factory in a near future. There is a conveyor belt on which five men are standing four of these men are identical, their smiles look fake and in fact they look a little scary. The fifth man looks quite different from the other(à mettre au pluriel), he’s small ans skinny and is about to do (utilsez "être jeté")throw in a dumpster because (mettre un sujet )is not « perfect ». This document show (le s du présent) that in (article) near future there will be a selective breeding and the flaw(mettez plutôt flaw au pluriel sans article) will not be accepted. Thus everybody will be similar.
Moreover(ne convient pas, pourquoi dire "de plus"?) the second document is about genetically engineering(participe passé) babies, the text is about the possibly(possibilté , il faut le nom, pas l'adverbe) to « design your babies » that is to say enable people to select their baby(pluriel, il y a plusieurs people, donc plusieurs babies) according to its(pluriel) characteristics. Such a technique would certainly change humanity since scientists would be able to eradicate some diseases which nowadays cause millions of deaths per years(singulier).

Réponse: Aide /Cartoon de milasosa, postée le 10-01-2015 à 16:08:48 (S | E)
Bonjour,
je ne vois pas comment changer "I chose of help me ".

I chose of help me a cartoon where the name of the cartoonist is unkown. The scene takes place in a factory in the near future. There is a conveyor belt on which five men are standing four of these men are identical, their smiles look fake and actually they look a little scary. The fifth man looks quite different from the others, he’s small and skinny and is about to be threw in a dumpster because he is not « perfect ». This document shows that in the near future there will be a selective breeding and flaws will not be accepted. Thus everybody will be similar.
The second document is about genetically engineered babies, the text is about the possibilitly to « design your babies » that is to say enable people to selct their baby according to its characteristics. Such a technique would certainly change humanity since scientists would be able to eradicate some diseases which nowadays cause millions of deaths per year.

Merci pour tout.

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Modifié par lucile83 le 10-01-2015 16:14

Réponse: Aide /Cartoon de gerondif, postée le 10-01-2015 à 16:53:27 (S | E)
Bonjour,
je ne vois pas comment changer "I chose of help me ".
Ah bon ? Pourtant, vous savez qu'on dit: I chose to come at 4 o'clock.
Le plus simple alors serait de garder I chose tout seul !
"me" ne va pas de toutes façons quand I et me sont la même personne on met myself: He cut me // I cut myself.

I chose ~~of help me~~ a cartoon where the name of the cartoonist is unkown. The scene takes place in a factory in the near future. There is a conveyor belt on which five men are standing,(virgule) four of these men are identical, their smiles look fake and actually they look a little scary. The fifth man looks quite different from the others, he’s small and skinny and is about to be threw(participe passé) in a dumpster because he is not « perfect ». This document shows that in the near future there will be a selective breeding and flaws will not be accepted. Thus everybody will be similar.
The second document is about genetically engineered babies, the text is about the possibilitly to « design your babies » that is to say enable people to select their baby(pluriel!!) according to its(pluriel) characteristics. Such a technique would certainly change humanity since scientists would be able to eradicate some diseases which nowadays cause millions of deaths per year.

Réponse: Aide /Cartoon de milasosa, postée le 11-01-2015 à 08:58:27 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup.

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Modifié par lucile83 le 11-01-2015 09:00

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