Comme des milliers de personnes, recevez gratuitement chaque semaine Lettre motivation/aide
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Message de jaeden69 posté le 22-06-2015 à 22:12:42 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous,
Je suis actuellement à la recherche d'un stage à l'étranger et plus particulièrement à Malte. J'ai rédigé une lettre de motivation mais je ne suis pas sûre de la formulation et de l'anglais. Car justement je souhaite améliorer mon anglais grâce à ce stage.
Pourriez-vous donc jeter un coup d'oeil et me dire ce que vous en pensez et apporter des corrections si nécessaire.
Je vous remercie par avance de votre aide précieuse.
XXXXX
XXXXX code town
June the 22th, 2015
Subject: Internship in Administration
Dear Sir or Madam,
Your advertisement in (source) for the position of administration trainee sparked my interest. Indeed, I believe that my education and employment background are appropriate for the position.
The placement business seems like the perfect field to do my internship and working for a company such as yours would be for me an honour and a real challenge.
I am currently enrolled at Pôle emploi (the French job centre) and I intend to use this time by doing an internship that will offer me the opportunity to improve my English skills, discover another culture and also get work experience abroad.
Through my last experience as a receptionist in an international company based in xxx I noticed how much English is crucial.
Thanks to my bachelor’s degree in administration and human resources realised in an apprenticeship program, I have a strong experience in both fields and it’s my major strength because you’ll benefit from an experienced applicant.
My various work experiences have enabled me to develop my interpersonal skills, my sense of responsibilities, and become well-organised. I am a hard-working person and reliable. I am eager to learn new things and I aim to adapt myself quickly to be useful.
I am enclosing my resume, which provides more details about my qualifications for the position.
I remain at your disposal for any further information you may require and I look forward to the opportunity to discuss with you.
Thank you, in advance, for your consideration.
Yours faithfully
Mrs XXXX
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 22-06-2015 23:00
Message de jaeden69 posté le 22-06-2015 à 22:12:42 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous,
Je suis actuellement à la recherche d'un stage à l'étranger et plus particulièrement à Malte. J'ai rédigé une lettre de motivation mais je ne suis pas sûre de la formulation et de l'anglais. Car justement je souhaite améliorer mon anglais grâce à ce stage.
Pourriez-vous donc jeter un coup d'oeil et me dire ce que vous en pensez et apporter des corrections si nécessaire.
Je vous remercie par avance de votre aide précieuse.
XXXXX
XXXXX code town
June the 22th, 2015
Subject: Internship in Administration
Dear Sir or Madam,
Your advertisement in (source) for the position of administration trainee sparked my interest. Indeed, I believe that my education and employment background are appropriate for the position.
The placement business seems like the perfect field to do my internship and working for a company such as yours would be for me an honour and a real challenge.
I am currently enrolled at Pôle emploi (the French job centre) and I intend to use this time by doing an internship that will offer me the opportunity to improve my English skills, discover another culture and also get work experience abroad.
Through my last experience as a receptionist in an international company based in xxx I noticed how much English is crucial.
Thanks to my bachelor’s degree in administration and human resources realised in an apprenticeship program, I have a strong experience in both fields and it’s my major strength because you’ll benefit from an experienced applicant.
My various work experiences have enabled me to develop my interpersonal skills, my sense of responsibilities, and become well-organised. I am a hard-working person and reliable. I am eager to learn new things and I aim to adapt myself quickly to be useful.
I am enclosing my resume, which provides more details about my qualifications for the position.
I remain at your disposal for any further information you may require and I look forward to the opportunity to discuss with you.
Thank you, in advance, for your consideration.
Yours faithfully
Mrs XXXX
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 22-06-2015 23:00
Réponse: Lettre motivation/aide de gerondif, postée le 22-06-2015 à 23:57:04 (S | E)
Bonjour,
erreurs en bleu, corrections en vert.
XXXXX
XXXXX code town
June the 22th, 2015 (l'abbréviation de first 1st, second 2nd, third 3rd)
Subject: Internship in Administration
Dear Sir or Madam,
Your advertisement in (source) for the position of administration trainee sparked my interest. Indeed, I believe that my education and employment background are appropriate for the position.
The placement business seems like the perfect field to do my internship and working for a company such as yours would be for me an honour and a real challenge.
I am currently enrolled at Pôle emploi (the French job centre) and I intend to use this time by doing an internship that will offer me the opportunity to improve my English skills, discover another culture and also get work experience abroad.
Through my last experience as a receptionist in an international company based in xxx I noticed how much English is crucial. (How s'applique à l'adjectif, en fait comme dans how old/how tall are you?, il faut dire how crucial English is)
Thanks to my bachelor’s degree in administration and human resources realised in an apprenticeship program, I have a strong experience in both fields and it’s my major strength because you’ll benefit from an experienced applicant.
My various work experiences have enabled me to develop my interpersonal skills, my sense of responsibilities, and (to)become well-organised. I am a hard-working and reliable person. I am eager to learn new things and I aim to adapt myself quickly to be useful.
I am enclosing my resume, which provides more details about my qualifications for the position.
I remain at your disposal for any further information you may require and I look forward to the opportunity to discuss with you.
Thank you, in advance, for your consideration.
Yours faithfully,
Mrs XXXX
Réponse: Lettre motivation/aide de jaeden69, postée le 23-06-2015 à 12:10:24 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup gerondif
Je me doutais que quelque chose sonnait faux avec "how much English is crucial" ...
En tout cas, je vous remercie pour votre lettre et j'espère que celle-ci saura convaincre...
Bonne journée à vous.
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