Correction/shopping choices

Correction/shopping choices
Message de loanoob posté le 05-08-2015 à 18:56:49 (S | E | F)
Bonjour !
En septembre je vais dans une classe préparatoire scientifique mais où l'anglais compte énormément. Or j'ai de très grosses difficultés dans cette matière depuis toujours. Pour m’entraîner j'ai décidé de rédiger un sujet d'expression dans les conditions d'examen, donc sans dictionnaire, traducteur électronique ou autre. J'aimerais donc que vous m'indiquiez mes erreurs (il doit y en avoir beaucoup ! ) pour que j'essaye de me corriger et de progresser.
Ps: Je suis censée avoir un niveau Bac S donc B2 je crois.
Merci !
Le sujet : What influences our shopping choices ?

-In the all over the world, each person has chopping choices. But each person is different and the choices are not identiques between two persons. So, what influences our shopping choices ?
-First clothes or other products don't have the same cost and people don't have the same money. Indeed a person who don't have money (or not many) can't buy an expensive clothe. An other person with some money can buy this product.
-Then people are differents and each person doesn't have the same size. For exemple when I was in a store I saw a beautiful clothe but this clothe wasn't in my size. So I bought an other clothe. So the size of produc influences our shopping choices.
-After the shape and colors can influence shopping choices. A person can like the blue color and she can hate the green color. But, sometimes, in store there are not a lot of colors. For instances one person can see a good dress and want the blue one but there isn't blue dress, only a green dress. This person decided to buy an other dress.
-Finally the other persons can influence our choice. If we buy a product and our friend don't like this product we can be isolated like pupils in a school. So, sometimes, in a store we bought a product which wasn't beautiful for us but good for our friends.
-To conclude we can say that there are a lot of things which influence our shopping choice like size, colors, coast or other persons.

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Modifié par lucile83 le 05-08-2015 21:29

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Réponse: Correction/shopping choices de here4u, postée le 06-08-2015 à 09:57:18 (S | E)
Hello !

-In the all over the world, each person has chopping choices. But each person is different and the choices are not identiques between two persons. So, what influences our shopping choices ?
-First clothes or other products don't have the same cost and people don't have the same money.(grammatically right, but clumsy!) Indeed a person who don't have money (or not many) can't buy an expensive clothe. An other person with some money can buy this product.
-Then people are differents and each person doesn't have2 wrong constructions+ voc. ...) the same size. For exemple when I was in a store I saw a beautiful clothe but this clothe wasn't in my size. So I bought an other clothe. So the size of XXX produc influences our shopping choices.
-After the shape and colors can influence shopping choices. A person can like the blue color and she can hate the green color. But, sometimes, in a store there are not a lot of colors. For instances one person can see a good dress and want the blue one but there isn't X blue dress, only a green dress. This person decided to buy an other dress.
-Finally the other persons can influence our choice. If we buy a product and our friend don't like this product we can be isolated like pupils in a school.(not clear) So, sometimes, in a store we bought a product which wasn't beautiful for us but good for our friends.(very very clumsy ...)
-To conclude we can say that there are a lot of things which influence our shopping choice like size, colors, coast or other persons.

(you should have mentioned 'fashion', 'adverts', 'comfort' and have extended your reflection to other products than clothes!)

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Réponse: Correction/shopping choices de loanoob, postée le 07-08-2015 à 15:31:44 (S | E)
Bonjour,
-From all over the world, each person has shopping choices. But each person is different and the choices are not identical between two persons. So, what influences our shopping choices?
-First clothes or other products don't have the same cost and people don't have the same money. Indeed a person who doesn’t have money (or not a lot) can't buy an expensive cloth. Other person with some money can buy this product.
-Then people are different and certain persons don’t have the same size. For example when I was in a store I saw a nice cloth but this cloth wasn't of my size. So I bought an other cloth. So the size of the product influences our shopping choices.
-Then the shape and colors can influence shopping choices. A person can like blue and can hate green. But, sometimes, in some stores there are not a lot of colors. For instance one person can see a nice dress and want the blue one but there isn't a blue dress, only a green dress. This person decide to buy an other dress. (je comprends pas ce qui va pas avec le an other à chaque fois)
-Finally the other persons can influence our choice. If we buy a product and our friend doesn’t like this product we can be isolated like pupils in a school (text 1)
So, sometimes, in a store we buy a product which isn’t beautiful for us but good for our friends. (je sais que c’est maladroit mais je n’arrivais pas à trouver d’autres formulations sans être à peu près sûre de la construction…)
-To conclude we can say that there are a lot of things which influence our shopping choice like size, colors, price or other persons.


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Modifié par lucile83 le 07-08-2015 16:33

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Réponse: Correction/shopping choices de here4u, postée le 09-08-2015 à 21:32:54 (S | E)
Hello !

-From all over the world, each person has XXXX (I'd put an adjective...to express diversity!)shopping choices. But each person is different and the choices are not identical between two persons. So, what influences our shopping choices?
-First clothes or other products don't have the same cost and people don't have the same money. Indeed a person who doesn’t have money (or not a lot) can't buy an expensive cloth. Other person with some money can buy this product.
-Then people are different and certain persons don’t have the same size. For example when I was in a store I saw a nice cloth but this cloth wasn't of my size. So I bought an other cloth. So the size of the product influences our shopping choices.
-Then the shape and colors can influence shopping choices. A person can like blue and can hate green. But, sometimes, in some stores there are not a lot of colors. For instance one person can see a nice dress and want the blue one but there isn't a blue dress, only a green dress. This person decide tense?)to buy an other dress. (je comprends pas ce qui va pas avec le an other à chaque fois) C'est en un seul mot!
-Finally the other persons can influence our choice. If we buy a product and our friend doesn’t like this product we can be isolated like pupils in a school (text 1)(looked down on ... )
So, sometimes, in a store we buy a product which isn’t beautiful for us but good for our friends. (je sais que c’est maladroit mais je n’arrivais pas à trouver d’autres formulations sans être à peu près sûre de la construction…)
-To conclude we can say that there are a lot of things which influence our shopping choice like size, colors, price or other persons.
A little better, but I think you're still missing the point... (you need to speak about trends or fashion, and adverts...)

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