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Message de johnmax132 posté le 09-01-2016 à 00:12:02 (S | E | F)
Bonjour tout le monde,
Dans le cadre de mes études je dois passer un oral la semaine prochaine. J'ai écrit une première ébauche de ce que je vais dire (ma présentation, présentation entreprise et présentation sujet stage). Est-ce que vous pouvez m'aider à corriger les fautes (orthographe et grammaire) et je suis preneur de vos idées pour l'améliorer. Merci !!
Intro:
Good morning/afternoon, everyone, and thank you to the opportunity this morning/afternoon. I am very happy to be here. Today I want present you some subjects. First I would like to start by introduce myself with my atypical educational background. Then I will talk about my company. It is a builder of prestigious brand of helicopter witch asserts its identity and philosophy through its constant capacity for innovation. Finally, I will focus on my main learning component. After my presentation, if you have any question I will do my best to answer them.
My presentation:
My name is xxx, I am twenty-four years old. I come from xxx, the cosmopolitan city (you know). It is also a student town which makes it easy to study and live in. It is a very dynamic city with more than fifty-two thousand students and home to one of the oldest Universities in Europe. But I recently moved to xxx to continue my studies in a Master degree with a specialization in software engineering. I am taking a training course in software development in alternation with apprenticeship. It is an opportunity to learn and improve my capacity to apply concepts in daily work. I am studying IT management. In this education I was learn to master fundamentals of Management and the engineering design while using programming.
J'ai commencé à faire la présentation de mon sujet d'apprentissage:
I took up apprenticeship as computer scientist in October 2015 (twenty fifteen). I work in a design and technical department. They have a powerful numeric analytical computer. The service required new informatics tool to improve sustainability performance.
The users frequently complain that in view of improving the quality of comparative studies in the field of modeling and simulation program. My first work was to define the technical specifications. We want a new graphical interface for calculator engines. Every project is therefore appraised in accordance with specific criteria, the most important being the property's current and future profitability. Obviously we are used to comfort, and design is our preoccupation. On the other hand, we are looking for reliability of the product. I will test and controlled so as to reduce to the minimum the probabilities of the occurrence of any anomalies. Basically to avoid losing money. We want to get the best value quality provides a passable rendering, but the computation time is long. Our intention is that this project should have a longer-term viability. In this case, it is may result in other project. This means that is only the beginning of apprenticeship adeventure.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 09-01-2016 08:19
Mise en forme standard et anonymat
Message de johnmax132 posté le 09-01-2016 à 00:12:02 (S | E | F)
Bonjour tout le monde,
Dans le cadre de mes études je dois passer un oral la semaine prochaine. J'ai écrit une première ébauche de ce que je vais dire (ma présentation, présentation entreprise et présentation sujet stage). Est-ce que vous pouvez m'aider à corriger les fautes (orthographe et grammaire) et je suis preneur de vos idées pour l'améliorer. Merci !!
Intro:
Good morning/afternoon, everyone, and thank you to the opportunity this morning/afternoon. I am very happy to be here. Today I want present you some subjects. First I would like to start by introduce myself with my atypical educational background. Then I will talk about my company. It is a builder of prestigious brand of helicopter witch asserts its identity and philosophy through its constant capacity for innovation. Finally, I will focus on my main learning component. After my presentation, if you have any question I will do my best to answer them.
My presentation:
My name is xxx, I am twenty-four years old. I come from xxx, the cosmopolitan city (you know). It is also a student town which makes it easy to study and live in. It is a very dynamic city with more than fifty-two thousand students and home to one of the oldest Universities in Europe. But I recently moved to xxx to continue my studies in a Master degree with a specialization in software engineering. I am taking a training course in software development in alternation with apprenticeship. It is an opportunity to learn and improve my capacity to apply concepts in daily work. I am studying IT management. In this education I was learn to master fundamentals of Management and the engineering design while using programming.
J'ai commencé à faire la présentation de mon sujet d'apprentissage:
I took up apprenticeship as computer scientist in October 2015 (twenty fifteen). I work in a design and technical department. They have a powerful numeric analytical computer. The service required new informatics tool to improve sustainability performance.
The users frequently complain that in view of improving the quality of comparative studies in the field of modeling and simulation program. My first work was to define the technical specifications. We want a new graphical interface for calculator engines. Every project is therefore appraised in accordance with specific criteria, the most important being the property's current and future profitability. Obviously we are used to comfort, and design is our preoccupation. On the other hand, we are looking for reliability of the product. I will test and controlled so as to reduce to the minimum the probabilities of the occurrence of any anomalies. Basically to avoid losing money. We want to get the best value quality provides a passable rendering, but the computation time is long. Our intention is that this project should have a longer-term viability. In this case, it is may result in other project. This means that is only the beginning of apprenticeship adeventure.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 09-01-2016 08:19
Mise en forme standard et anonymat
Réponse: Correction / Présentation de johnmax132, postée le 12-01-2016 à 17:37:25 (S | E)
Quelqu'un pour me donner quelque conseil ? je dois passer jeudi à l'oral.
Réponse: Correction / Présentation de gerondif, postée le 12-01-2016 à 23:53:16 (S | E)
Bonjour,
erreurs en bleu, corrections en vert
Intro:
Good morning/afternoon, everyone, and thank you to the opportunity this morning/afternoon. I am very happy to be here. Today I want to present you some subjects(lourd, maladroit). First I would like to start by introduce(by + ing) myself with my atypical educational background. Then I will talk(causer? un peu léger comme verbe) about my company. It is a builder of a prestigious brand of helicopter witch asserts its identity and philosophy through its constant capacity for innovation. Finally, I will focus on my main learning component (sens?). After my presentation, if you have any questions I will do my best to answer them.
(Personnellement, si j'étais dans la salle à vous écouter je trouverais cela un peu long et je me dirais "eh bien vas-y!")
My presentation:
My name is xxx, I am twenty-four years old. I come from xxx, the cosmopolitan city (you know). It is also a student town (a university town),(virgule, pause) which makes it easy to study and live in. It is a very dynamic city with more than fifty-two thousand students and home to one of the oldest Universities in Europe. But I recently moved to xxx to continue my studies in a Master degree with a specialization in software engineering. I am taking a training course in software development in alternation with apprenticeship. It is an opportunity to learn and improve my capacity to apply concepts in daily work. I am studying IT management. In this education(course) I was learn(1) vous confondez to learn, apprendre, avaler un cours et to teach, enseigner 2) il faut un participe passé dans cette voi passive) to master fundamentals of Management and the engineering design while using programming.
J'ai commencé à faire la présentation de mon sujet d'apprentissage:
I took up apprenticeship as a computer scientist in October 2015 (twenty fifteen). I work in a design and technical department. They have a powerful numeric analytical computer. The service required new informatics tools to improve sustainability performance.
The users frequently complain that in view of improving the quality of comparative studies in the field of modeling and simulation program, (là, j'attends la phrase qui devrait suivre, ils se plaignent de quoi ??). My first work was to define the technical specifications. We want a new graphical interface for calculator engines. Every project is therefore appraised in accordance with specific criteria, the most important being the property's current and future profitability. Obviously we are used to comfort, and design is our preoccupation. On the other hand, we are looking for reliability of the product. I will test and controlled(base verbale)(pas de cod à ces deux verbes??) so as to reduce to the minimum the probabilities of the occurrence of any anomalies. Basically to avoid losing money. We want to get the best value quality provides a passable rendering(telescopage de deux phrases: nous voulons obtenir la meilleure qualité de valeur fournit un rendement passable ???), but the computation time is long. Our intention is that this project should have a longer-term viability. In this case, it
Honnêtement, je ne comprends pas grand chose au dernier paragraphe.
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