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Message de darkenit posté le 19-03-2016 à 14:35:13 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je passe l'expression oral du Bac dans quelques mois et je publie mon texte sur l'idée de progrès afin que quelqu'un corrige mes fautes et me donne un avis.
Merci d'avance.
I’m going to talk about the idea of progress, first, it could be defined as the different advanced which improved the human condition. The progress implicate changing and positive evolution all along the history, this progress is more important since the last 10 years. But Is it only a benefice ? To answer this question I’m going to talk about the science and we are going to see the positive and the negative aspect of it.
1.Progress
So along the last century science increase our life expectancy thanks to the discovery and the new treatments technology.
The CNN report about the brain lab company show us what science progress could brought us. In this document we can hear the creator of this company talking about their activities. We learn that this research team study the operation of the human brain. The purpose is to create better prosthesis for the people who were amputated or who have malformation. They already help the patient who have a paralysed member.
Another report exposed us how did the progress can help us in the medical field. In effect in this video the journalist talk about the robot who can clean the house or the other who can mow the lawn but it’s the presentation of the RP-V robot who interests us. This robot is able to move in an hospital ad to complete a treatment card. It can already being controlled by a real doctor. It’s an interesting invention because it will permit to the doctor to treat patient in different hospital.
And finally, the text “saviour sibling” talk about the IVF procreation and how it could save life. In the text a young boy suffering from an extremely rare genetic problem and his parents decided to transplanted cells from the umbilical cord of his brother born by IVF to get a tissue match. And Now the boy is completely healthy.
In conclusion, these document show us that the progress in science have ameliorate the treatments techniques and permit to save many life.
2.Fear
But the progress can create fear, in effect there is already negative aspect in progress.
The “wondercopy” short story treat this subject. The scene take place in 2089, two old friends Braling and Smith plans a travel in Rio together but their wife are not agree. They decided to buy a clone of them. These clone are made with DNA to get a clone really close from us. But Smith discovered that her wife had already buy a clone of her and the Braling copy fall in love with his wife and decided to kill the real Braling. In this story the robot developed their own intelligence and start to be dangerous.
The movie I-Robot talk also about it. It take place in the future and the robot are everywhere to help the human in their task. But a robot start developing feelings, and dreaming. And he try a revolution with the other robot. In this case too, the artificial intelligence became dangerous because it’s start to being better than the human intelligence and it revolts against the humanity.
The movie Gattaca showed us the danger of the DNA analyse. In this movie the society is dived in 2 groups of people, the valid and the in-valid. Vincent the hero is considered as an in-valid because he have heart problems. Because of it he can’t work as astronaut and so he won’t realised his dream, to go in space. But he stole the identity of Jerome a valid men. Thanks to his identity he finally go in mission and realised his dream. In this movie the DNA is used to create class in the society and it became a factor of inequality.
And finally, the book “my sister’s keeper” present the problems of the baby who are procreate to save the other one. In this book, Anna a thirteen year old girl ask legal advice to a lawyer, because she was born in the purpose to give her kidney to her sister Kate who is going to die. So she went to the lawyer because she don’t want to give her kidney. In this case she was born to save her sister but nobody ask her about her opinion.
These documents, showed us the aspect negative that the progress can bring in the science and medical field.
In conclusion, we can say that progress is necessary to ameliorate our life but we have to be aware of the danger that it could create. And all the invention have to be used in the way of being useful and safe for the humanity.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 19-03-2016 17:23
Message de darkenit posté le 19-03-2016 à 14:35:13 (S | E | F)
Bonjour,
je passe l'expression oral du Bac dans quelques mois et je publie mon texte sur l'idée de progrès afin que quelqu'un corrige mes fautes et me donne un avis.
Merci d'avance.
I’m going to talk about the idea of progress, first, it could be defined as the different advanced which improved the human condition. The progress implicate changing and positive evolution all along the history, this progress is more important since the last 10 years. But Is it only a benefice ? To answer this question I’m going to talk about the science and we are going to see the positive and the negative aspect of it.
1.Progress
So along the last century science increase our life expectancy thanks to the discovery and the new treatments technology.
The CNN report about the brain lab company show us what science progress could brought us. In this document we can hear the creator of this company talking about their activities. We learn that this research team study the operation of the human brain. The purpose is to create better prosthesis for the people who were amputated or who have malformation. They already help the patient who have a paralysed member.
Another report exposed us how did the progress can help us in the medical field. In effect in this video the journalist talk about the robot who can clean the house or the other who can mow the lawn but it’s the presentation of the RP-V robot who interests us. This robot is able to move in an hospital ad to complete a treatment card. It can already being controlled by a real doctor. It’s an interesting invention because it will permit to the doctor to treat patient in different hospital.
And finally, the text “saviour sibling” talk about the IVF procreation and how it could save life. In the text a young boy suffering from an extremely rare genetic problem and his parents decided to transplanted cells from the umbilical cord of his brother born by IVF to get a tissue match. And Now the boy is completely healthy.
In conclusion, these document show us that the progress in science have ameliorate the treatments techniques and permit to save many life.
2.Fear
But the progress can create fear, in effect there is already negative aspect in progress.
The “wondercopy” short story treat this subject. The scene take place in 2089, two old friends Braling and Smith plans a travel in Rio together but their wife are not agree. They decided to buy a clone of them. These clone are made with DNA to get a clone really close from us. But Smith discovered that her wife had already buy a clone of her and the Braling copy fall in love with his wife and decided to kill the real Braling. In this story the robot developed their own intelligence and start to be dangerous.
The movie I-Robot talk also about it. It take place in the future and the robot are everywhere to help the human in their task. But a robot start developing feelings, and dreaming. And he try a revolution with the other robot. In this case too, the artificial intelligence became dangerous because it’s start to being better than the human intelligence and it revolts against the humanity.
The movie Gattaca showed us the danger of the DNA analyse. In this movie the society is dived in 2 groups of people, the valid and the in-valid. Vincent the hero is considered as an in-valid because he have heart problems. Because of it he can’t work as astronaut and so he won’t realised his dream, to go in space. But he stole the identity of Jerome a valid men. Thanks to his identity he finally go in mission and realised his dream. In this movie the DNA is used to create class in the society and it became a factor of inequality.
And finally, the book “my sister’s keeper” present the problems of the baby who are procreate to save the other one. In this book, Anna a thirteen year old girl ask legal advice to a lawyer, because she was born in the purpose to give her kidney to her sister Kate who is going to die. So she went to the lawyer because she don’t want to give her kidney. In this case she was born to save her sister but nobody ask her about her opinion.
These documents, showed us the aspect negative that the progress can bring in the science and medical field.
In conclusion, we can say that progress is necessary to ameliorate our life but we have to be aware of the danger that it could create. And all the invention have to be used in the way of being useful and safe for the humanity.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 19-03-2016 17:23
Réponse: EO Bac/aide de laure95, postée le 20-03-2016 à 11:11:52 (S | E)
Bonjour,
- the different Advanced (mettre le nom sinon il faut ajouter un nom après) which improved the human condition.
- this progress is more important since the last 10 years: PRESENT PERFECT + SINCE, SINCE + DATE.
- But Is it only a benefice ? To answer this question I’m going to talk about the science and we are going to see the positive and the negative aspect (plurielof it.
- 1.Progress
So along the last century science increase (temps)our life expectancy
- the new treatments (prépossition)technology.
- The CNN report about the brain lab company show (conjugaison)us what science progress could brought (COULD + INFINITIF)us.
- We learn that this research team study (conjguaison)the operation of the human brain.
- They already help the patient (pluriel) who have a paralysed member (pluriel.
- Another report exposed us how did the progress can help us in the medical field: question indirecte: MOT INTERROGATIF + SUJET + VERBE CONJUGUE. Tu ne peux pas mettre DID avec CAN.
- In effect in this video the journalist talk (conjugaison)about the robot who (pas le bon relatif, un robot n'est pas une personne)can clean the house or the other who can mow the lawn
- but it’s the presentation of the RP-V robot who (pas le bon relatif)interests us.
- This robot is able to move in an hospital ad (ad ?)to complete a treatment card.
- It can already being (CAN + INFINITIF) controlled by a real doctor.
- It’s an interesting invention because it will permit to the doctor to treat patient in different hospital (pluriel).
- And finally, the text “saviour sibling” talk about (un texte ne parle pas)the IVF procreation
- to transplanted (TO + INFINITIF)cells from the umbilical cord of his brother born by IVF to get a tissue match.
- In conclusion (utilise un autre mot car on croit que ton exposé est finit), these document (pluriel)show us that the progress in science have ameliorate (HAVE + PARTICIPE PASSE)the treatments (singulier)techniques and permit to save many life. (MANY + PLURIEL)
- 2.Fear
in effect there is already negative aspect (mettre au pluriel)in progress.
- The “wondercopy” short story treat (conjugaison) this subject. The scene take (conjugaison)place in 2089, two old friends Braling and Smith plans (conjguaison)a travel in Rio together but their wife are not agree (ne pas être d'accord: TO DISAGREE).
-But Smith discovered that her wife had already buy (HAD + PARTICIPE PASSE)a clone of her and the Braling copy fall (passé)in love
- In this story the robot developed their (singulier)own intelligence and start (passé)to be dangerous.
- The movie I-Robot talk (un film ne parle pas) also about it. It take (conjugaison place in the future and the robot (pluriel) are everywhere to help the human in their task (pluriel). But a robot start (conjugaison)developing feelings, and dreaming. And he try (conjugaison)a revolution with the other robot.
- it’s start (forme verbale qui n'existe pas)to being ( TO + INFINITIF) better
- the DNA analyse (ce n'est pas le nom).
- In this movie the society is dived
in 2 groups of people, - because he have (conjugaison)heart problems.
- Because of it he can’t work as (article)astronaut and so he won’t realised (WON'T + INFINITIF)his dream, to go in (pas la bonne préposition) space.
- Thanks to his identity he finally go (conjugaison in (préposition fausse)mission and realised (présent)his dream.
- to create class (pluriel) in the society.
-And finally, the book “my sister’s keeper” present (conjugaison)the problems of the baby who are procreate (conjguaison, VERBE AU PARTICIPE PASSE)to save the other one.
- In this book, Anna a thirteen year old girl ask (conjguaison)legal advice to a lawyer,
- So she went to the lawyer (mal dit) because she don’t want (conjguaison)to give her kidney.
- but nobody ask her about her opinion: passé
- And all the invention (pluriel have to be used in the way of being useful and safe for the humanity.
REVOIS LA CONJUGAISON DU PRESENT SIMPLE!
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